Page 39 of Tango
“I appreciate it.” I licked my lips and scanned the darkness for any sign of lights or movement. We were just out of town when we pulled over and Amina jumped out of the truck.
“Beckett, do you have a light?”
“Here.” I handed her my flashlight, and she awkwardly held it as she began to climb a hill. I felt unprotected as I followed her with the other two men behind me. A strange feeling crept up my spine; I just didn’t know what it meant yet.
Amina stopped suddenly and turned to look up at me. Then she directed the beam of light until it landed on a pile of dirt and rocks. Three larger rocks were placed carefully one on top of the other. “Every man, woman, and child deserves to be laid to rest.”
I sucked in a mouthful of air when I realized what she meant. It was Brown’s grave. She’d made sure he was buried properly. She’d helped him move on from this world. I dropped to my knees as emotion flooded through me, and once again, I felt the weight of his death on my shoulders.
“No,” Amina said from behind me, and I thought she warned the others not to come close. She knelt at my side as I gave in and cried for my friend.
Everything hurt as I let the anger and pain I’d held back for so long pour from me. I hadn’t dealt with Brown’s death, maybe because I’d been so set on taking down Hill that I used the pain to fuel my fire, but I was damn tired of the burning pit in my stomach, and it felt good to finally let it go.
Once I was tapped out, I took a long, deep breath and sat back on my heels. The heat from the sun could already be felt as it began to rise over the mountains.
“Thank you for this,” I whispered. “I’ve been so scared wondering what happened to his body, I couldn’t…” I stopped to gather my emotions again.
“Holding on to what was will never allow you hold on to what is. I’m not saying that to ask you to let what happened go completely, but your friend is not coming back. You are here now, so gather up the twigs and branches and start building your fire and flush out the bad man.”
“I can do that.” I dried my eyes and ran a hand over my face, letting her metaphor sink in.
“It’s what I’m doing.” Her eyes lit up, and I knew she was smiling, and I smiled back and felt a little less heavy. She looked down at my arm and tilted her head. “You wear the wolf.”
“It was a gift.”
“I know.” She nodded, and I realized maybe she knew more about me than I thought. After all, Frank had set this up.
“Imdad Jaber spread the word about what you did for his son, Halim. If he gave you the wolf, that means it is what you are. A leader.”
“I told the boy a story about how I kept seeing wolves when I was stationed here. We even saw one together.”
“Wolves are drawn to their leaders,” she said with certainty. “You must let this go and get back to being the leader you are. Everything else will fall into place. It always does.” The way she said the last part made me wonder what she meant.
“I’m going to need the body,” I whispered.
“Ahmad will help you with that,” she stood and stretched her back, “but this is where we part ways.”
“Thank you, Amina. I wish I could do more for you and your family.”
“No need, my friend. Just get better here.” She placed a hand on her heart. “Inshallah.”
God’s will.
Ivy
“I promised Ty I wouldn’t do anything much while he was away—”
“Say no more.” Savannah’s face told me everything. She understood. “Zack’s it is. Let me check and get a table reserved and all that fun stuff.” She topped my mug up with coffee. “I’m the same way when Cole leaves. The more they can keep their heads in the mission, the better.”
“Yes.” I blew to clear the steam away.
“How are you holding up?”
“I’m fine when I don’t let my mind wander.” I stopped, as I heard voices. Cole and Moore were talking as they walked through the living room toward us. We both perked our ears to hear.
“No matter what, we have a check-in time. We both know it’s the team leader who does it, but on solo trips it’s on you.”
“What time’ll that be?” Moore questioned.