Page 44 of The Fae's Gamble

She needed time and space to decide. At least, that’s what he told himself. In reality, even though she didn’t have a name for it, Fern wrestled with the grip of the same mating bond that Calum did.

As they arrived in Edinburgh, Calum forced himself to drive to Fern’s apartment. He had a white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel the whole time, but he managed it.

There were two different versions of himself in his head that were battling them out.

The prince and the professor.

It wasn’t a fair fight. The prince didn’t mind bloodshed.

Calum tossed the car into park as he pulled into Fern’s driveway, looking at her sleeping face in the soft morning light.

You disappoint everyone you love, Calum. A million memories of Scotland’s magical inhabitants screaming in a blind madness for their lost magic flooded his mind. It’s better for her to give her space. She already rejected you one time.

In the end, his guilt was stronger than his instincts, and Calum gently shook Fern awake. She was adorable in a sleepy haze, murmuring soft sounds and refusing to open her eyes. It made Calum feel like his heart was going to give out.

“Fern, if you wake up, I’ll tell you what the bean-nighe said.”

“I’m up!” Fern jolted awake and stared at him expectantly, but Calum only laughed.

“I will tell you, once…”

“...only when you’re sure of some hunch you have and you’re able to locate a research paper from 1965 confirming your theory.” Fern rolled her eyes, finishing his sentence. Calum escorted her to the front door, taking a step back as she turned around.

There was a glimmer of disappointment in Fern’s eyes, like she had been expecting him to kiss her.

You’ve done enough for now. Calum’s thoughts were incessant, unable to let go of all the personal responsibilities he’d shouldered over the centuries.

“Get some sleep,” Calum couldn’t resist slipping a bit of a command into his tone, “then come to my office. We’ll talk.”

Fern unlocked her door and stepped inside, looking back over her shoulder at Calum with a smirk.

“I’ll see you after class then, professor.”

Calum fought back a growl.

I’m fucked.

* * *

Calum did not get any sleep. Instead, he changed into his office and went straight to the library. Some members of the magical community were nocturnal, and they kept the library open at all-hours to give them a place to congregate.

Even at the early hour, it was already busy. Calum was greeted with the scent of hot coffee and ink. He took a deep breath and allowed it to soothe his racing mind. The sound of his cane on the marble flooring alerted everyone to his presence, and everyone he passed turned to greet him.

“Hello, Your Highness.”

“Good morning, Your Majesty.”

“Madainn mhath!”

Calum responded in kind to each person while the nauseous feeling in his stomach grew. He’d stopped thinking of himself as worthy of their affections decades prior. That morning, it hurt even worse.

The fae who ran the archives desk was a kindhearted woman. Calum knew her personally from before Culloden. She used to work in the palace, and he’d done everything he could to get her settled in their new world.

“Morning, Aoife.” Calum placed a hot cup of coffee on the desk as a tribute. He knew it was only in fairytales that princes and kings ruled the world. In reality, it was librarians and receptionists.

“Ooh,” Aoife perked up from behind the desk, “did you forget the cinnamon this time?”

Calum crossed his heart. “It’ll never happen again, my darling.”