Page 16 of Spiteful Lies
“Astrid is my sister,” she smiles wickedly, “But I didn’t tell her. Everybody knows. That’s the problem with this school. People can’t hold onto a secret even if it has handles attached.”
Expressionless, Charlotte stares at me, and I want to say something, but not during Wren’s stellar meltdown. We could torture the silly girl, but it’s not important. Not as important as me telling Charlotte that I said nothing to Rawlins. I didn’t drop a hint to be malicious, and I need Charlotte to believe it isn’t payback. She needs to talk to someone before her behavior spirals out of control.
“Did Rawlins call you into her office?” I ask, and Charlotte nods, sending a look to shut my mouth. “I think she wants to talk to you about me,” I continue smoothly, “We spent the entire time talking about me; not a word about you.”
Charlotte takes the hint, and her shoulders relax as she crosses her legs. Meanwhile, Wren is flipping out as she checks her feed.
“He better not have told anyone else.” She eyes me. “Who did he tell, Astrid? Was he bragging to the boys?” Her phone chimes, and we’re forgotten as she leaps off the bed and heads for the door to talk in private. “Why is he such a dick to me?” Wren doesn’t wait for our answer as she closes the door behind her.
“I didn’t tell Rawlins. The only thing I said is that she should talk to you. Did you talk to her?”
Charlotte picks at a spot on her nails, looking at it instead of me. “No. And I don’t plan to. I don’t know which is worse. Her turning her nose up because I’m no longer a Howland or her showing pity for me. She’ll start a fund to keep me off the streets.” Charlotte looks me in the eye. “Astrid, is it hard being poor?”
I want to choke, but she’s serious. Carefully, I choose my words. I already know the answer, but how can I make it sound less depressing? “It depends on how poor you are. The poorer you are, the more it’s going to suck.”
Her brow bunches together. “I was afraid of that.”
“Charlotte, Dr. Rawlins adores you. That’s not a word in my vocabulary, but that’s the only way I can describe it. She might actually be able to help. You know, with a scholarship or something.”
“A scholarship?” She grimaces as if I had offered her something off-brand, like cosmetics or shoes. “No, I can’t do that. Everyone will know.”
“You care that much?”
She nods. “I care, but then I don’t care. It’s like I can’t make up my mind. My life went from routine to overwhelming in a second, and I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know how to give a shit anymore.”
I get up and sit beside her on the bed. I place my hand on her knee and hope that it’s sending a message that I’m serious. “Charlotte, don’t flake out yet. Please go see Dr. Rawlins.”
Chapter 14
Astrid
I begged the boys not to get even with Gillian. I don’t know what they would’ve done to her. I make it clear to Gillian that our friendship is over. She keeps sending me apology texts, but she doesn’t understand. I wouldn’t have done that to anyone. And then I think about Charlotte. But that’s different. I didn’t tell.
The dorm returns to quiet after I shut my alarm off, which means I have to get up and face Rawlins. Roni mumbles in her sleep as she slowly rolls over in her bed. Gradually, I get up and hurry into the bathroom. I just want to get this over with. Why am I bothering with lip gloss? Do I want to look fabulous while I’m being dragged off the school property? As soon as I pull on my blazer, there’s a soft tap on my door.
Justin stands in the hallway, and I peer at him from behind a gap between the door and the jamb. “Why are you here?” I whisper.
He smiles too brightly for 7:30 a.m. “You need my help.”
I swallow. “Let me get my coat.”
Justin holds my hand firmly as we walk toward Foxworth. He won’t listen to me and turn back. No reasoning, good or bad, will change his mind. He’s coming with me to talk to Dr. Rawlins. I do my best not to see his father in his profile, but I still do. I slip my hand out of his and shove it into my coat pocket.
“But what are you going to say?” I ask him.
“I have a grievance with the school, and now is the time to make it. I need you there as much as you need me.” Justin gazes at me. “You’ll see what I’m talking about.”
I sigh loudly, venting my frustration. “You know Rawlins will have a fit when she sees you.”
He grips my arm and stops me in my tracks. “Astrid, I don’t want you to leave. I’m afraid if you do, I won’t have a chance to redeem myself.”
I laugh nervously. “What do you mean? You haven’t done anything wrong.”
“Then why aren’t you looking into my eyes when you say that?” he asks, “You barely look at me anymore. Is it because I remind you of my father?” I pause a second too long, and he sighs, cutting me off before I can offer a lame excuse. “Your eyes used to sparkle when you looked at me. Whenever I was near, you would touch me. Little touches that held meaning, like placing your hand on mine or brushing a stray hair off my face. Not anymore. I don’t sense the love you had for me anymore.”
“I’m going through a rough time,” I reply softly, “that’s all.” It takes all my strength not to react when I lift my eyes to his. But I can tell by Justin’s reaction that I’ve failed. I didn’t respond, and that’s the problem. I may not have winced, but the look of love in my eyes is missing, and we both know it.
“Maybe this will bring the love back.” He tugs my elbow, and we continue to walk to Foxworth in silence.