Page 41 of Spiteful Lies

I look at Mom with pleading eyes as if she’ll have the answer. “They all seem nice,” she says slowly. “And they do care about you. Have they pushed you for an answer?”

I shake my head. “But we can’t just keep dating.”

Mom sighs and slips her hand in mine. “Astrid, I heard about Howland…dying. These people were tolerant of me today because they know that one day my daughter will own a part of Rockingham. I don’t think you grasp the wealth you’ll have in the future. And the power that comes with it. Don’t rush into making a choice. And be mindful that whoever you choose will own half of what you own if you don’t protect yourself. Your father avoided making a commitment to us until he needed us. Don’t be pushed into choosing by any man. It might cost you if you make the wrong choice.”

“But what if I want it all?” I ask quietly.

She shrugs carelessly. “Then take it all. You can afford it now.”

My eyes widen, but Mom means it. “I’m glad you came, Mom,” I tell her, “I was anxious, but I’m glad you came.”

She tilts her brow. “Were you scared I would embarrass you?”

I think my teeth will break the skin if I keep biting my lip. “I’m sorry,” I sob. “I’m so sorry.”

Mom holds me close and rubs my head. “Astrid, don’t cry. I was scared too. But I told myself to forget being perfect and just show up to do the best I can. You did the same thing your first day here, I’m sure. All your emotions are valid, and you have to keep acknowledging them. When you ignore them, that’s when you have to worry that you’re no longer you.”

A black town car pulls up to the curb, and a driver in a suit jumps out to open the back door for Mom. She nods her approval as he holds the door open. Mom kisses my cheek, her mouth near my ear. “Take it all, sweetie. The world has put you through a lot, and it owes you plenty.”

She lets go of me, and the man helps her into the car. Mom moves as if she was born into money, and I realize that she’s accepted what we’ve been given with more ease than I have. And sadly, I watch my reflection in the tinted windows as the car pulls away. I have changed. Like it or not, I have changed.

I turn my back on the people waiting by the stone gates and start walking down the street as if I’m going to Rockingham on foot. Mom doesn’t know. I won’t own half of Rockingham; I’ll own the whole thing. The former poor girl from Weymouth will own all of Rockingham. I wonder if the rich ever riot in the streets.

“Astrid.”

I come to a quick halt, and there’s a pounding of feet as the boys surround me. Dammit. I’m conscious of every eye on us, and I start walking again as they follow me. Only a fool wouldn’t suspect what’s going on, and my mother is no fool. We make it to the edge of the iron fence and turn the corner, out of sight of parents with prying eyes.

I flop down on the concrete sidewalk, not caring that I’m sitting unladylike in my fucking skirt. Right now, I just don’t care. Bryce immediately sits beside me, and Wyatt crowds in on the other side. Justin sits in front of me as Pierce remains standing, hovering over us. The feeling of being boxed in is overwhelming. And I hug my body as if touching myself will keep their hands off me. The tears blur my vision as I rock, and I feel a hand on my shoulder, rubbing it in circles. But who’s touching me? Shouldn’t I be able to tell? I’ve fucked them all.

Instantly, I shake the hand off me and climb up onto my feet. “Stop.” I hold up my hands to keep them back. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know. I can’t choose.”

The boys are silent as they look at me and then at each other. Pierce approaches me slowly with his hands raised. I smirk through my tears—half laughing and half crying like a madwoman. He looks like a pet parent who’s constantly clawed by his precious but wild cat.

“Astrid, it’s okay. No one is asking.”

“But you will,” My voice cracks. “And you should.”

Wyatt stands and clenches his fist. “Who’s been pushing you?” He looks angrily at the others. “Which one has been demanding that you pick?” His angry gaze lands on Justin.

Justin replies with a nastier glare, “It’s not me. I don’t need to play a game to win.”

“Am I just a prize to you all?” I shriek, “Is this nothing but a game? Because it’s also my life.”

Bryce rises, resting his hand on Justin’s shoulder and then shoving him as he stands. Justin shoves Bryce’s shoulder, but Bryce ignores it as he walks toward me. “Astrid. We’re not playing a game.” He looks at the others. “I know I’m not. I love you.” He touches my chin lightly with his fingertip. “I wouldn’t push you into anything.” I feel his breath on my lips as I stare at his. “You know I’d do anything to make you happy.”

“Aww, don’t shit on me, you little asshole.” Pierce charges Bryce, pushing him away from me and getting into his face. “On day one, you kept telling me you didn’t like her and said I should keep picking on her. Meanwhile, you were seeing her behind my back.” Pierce looks at me, and I see genuine hurt in his eyes. “Astrid, I am a loudmouthed asshole, but you know that. And you know I’ll never surprise you, because I’m not fake.”

“Fake?” Bryce’s eyes narrow. “You play the asshole, so when you act human, you earn points. Give you any excuse to party, and your pants drop to the floor.”

“Eenie meenie miney mo. Both of you are raging assholes,” chants Justin, “She’s upset, and what do you do? Fight in front of her.”

I stare at him. “You fight when I’m not around?”

For a moment, it’s so quiet I can hear voices drifting over from the campus. I stamp my foot and dry my eyes on the sleeve of my coat, leaving nasty mascara stains on the honey-brown fabric.

Fuck, next time, I’ll wear waterproof. I take off again, determined not to talk to them.

Wyatt catches up and walks in step with me.