Page 40 of Vengeful Queen
“I have the room, so I still use it. You’re living with Wren now?”
“I quit Theta.” She smiles weakly. “Too little, way too late.”
I touch her shoulder, but it feels false, so I pull back.
Tracey wipes a tear off her cheek. “You were brilliant, by the way. Helen was furious that Gamma showed Theta up. Not once, but twice.” For the finale, Gamma sang “I’m Every Woman,” with Jaxon handling the low notes.
“She raged on about it for days after. It made everyone uncomfortable. Eventually she was told to get a fucking grip and hold on to it.”
Tracey’s laughter morphs into big wet tears as she has an ugly cry. Will she be the next to leave?
Boundaries have to be ignored. I go to the bed and sit beside her. I hug her tight. I have class in twenty minutes, but I can’t leave. She’s too broken to leave on her own. Her tears slow as I rub her back, waiting for her to speak.
“It was awful the things they told us to do. They laughed at us.”
“What happened?” I whisper.
Tracey wipes her bloodshot eyes with the corner of her sleeve. The shirt is too large for her, and maybe it’s an old sweatshirt of Sam’s.
“For a task, they told us to strip. I was reluctant to do it, but the other girls were taking off their clothes. They giggled as if it were no big deal. I looked over at Prisha. She shrugged, and we undressed. And then they blindfolded us and hid our clothes. They told us we had to feel around and find them.”
Tracey inhales deeply, closing her eyes. I’m not sure if she is reliving the experience or trying to shut it out. I know how she feels, and a sadness falls over me as I lie down on the bed beside her. Tracey rolls onto her back, and we both stare up at the ceiling.
“While we fumbled around the room, they took pictures of us naked.” Tracey sniffs, wiping her nose with her palm. “I should’ve listened to my gut. I knew something was wrong. I could sense it as if I could see through the blindfold. I stood still, trying to figure out what had changed in the room. Someone grabbed my wrist and led me a few steps forward.
“Charlotte, I was relieved. I thought they were leading me to my clothes. They placed my hand on a person. I was touching bare skin. I yanked my hand away and pulled the blindfold down. I was standing naked in front of Kurt Ashford. And he had nothing on.”
Tracey can’t speak. Tears run down the side of her face as her mouth twists. I rub her shoulder, trying to soothe her, and encourage her to take a breath. Her crying is replaced with ragged breaths, then silence.
“I should’ve left,” she murmurs. She hasn’t fallen asleep.
Class started thirty minutes ago, but I stay with her. I’m worried, but I’m also ashamed of my curiosity.
“Prisha left in a rage,” continues Tracey, “threatening to sue as she tore the living room apart looking for her clothes. I wanted to help her look, but I was frozen. Her clothes were hidden under a cushion on the couch. They taunted her while she dressed. The things they said to her. She’s someone I never thought I’d see cry. Prisha stepped out into the hallway, cursing them at the top of her lungs. She looked at me and waited, but I didn’t go. I still wanted to be a Theta. I should’ve left with her.”
“Where was Wren?” I ask.
Tracey squeezes her lips together in a disapproving scowl. “Helen’s favorites weren’t there. She sent them away on a task with orders not to return until they received a text.” Tracey sits up in the bed, and her gaze rests on the door. “It was only a few Alpha brothers. No Sam or Jake. Helen and Kurt share secrets and photos. They dare each other. They pimp for each other.”
A nasty thought jabs me in my gut, and I picture Helen touching Asher again, wondering if there’s more. No. He would’ve told me. That’s not his way.
Tracey continues. “Helen told me that I would have the honor of sucking Kurt’s penis. He looked me up and down and then announced that he admires natural redheads. I felt sick and refused. Helen pulled my clothing out from under a floor cushion and shoved it in my arms. She turned vicious and told me to follow my little colored friend home. I cringed. The way she talked about Prisha after she was gone disgusted me. I should’ve left. But Sam told me he only dates Theta. I was miserable at the formal. He barely spoke to me and only danced with the Theta sisters. I was a pledge, and my place was not with him.”
“Doesn’t Sam know about the hazing?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “He knows about little things. Flashing is overlooked if the girl is willing, but touching is forbidden. Helen picked me out because she knew if I agreed, they all would. She knew how badly I wanted to be with Sam. Helen announced that we all need to learn how to please an Alpha without getting pregnant. She made it sound as if we were learning a useful life skill.” Tracey tears up and doesn’t bother to wipe her face. “I could have said no, even then, but I convinced myself that Sam would understand. If I refused, I’d be kicked out of Theta. I did it for him, and I lost him anyway.”
“Did Kurt tell him?” I ask.
“Kurt showed Sam the pictures Helen took. The sisters pretended to help by pulling our hair out of my face. But if we told, we were out.” Tracey inhales her tears away with a deep sigh. “Did Gamma make you do the same things?”
I look away. “No, the worst thing I had to do was give the house mother a foot rub.”
“I heard Gamma refused Alpha.” Tracey scoffs. “I’m such a dumbass.”
“No, you aren’t,” I tell her firmly. “Kurt used you to hurt Sam. Why else would they make it a point to yell at him? I didn’t talk about it, but Kurt cornered me in the Alpha bathroom. I was drunk, and I blocked it out. Later, I questioned myself if it happened the way I remembered, but it did. It’s not your fault he’s a predator.”
“I saw a thread. I was certain it was about him, so I posted what happened. I don’t care about their secrets anymore. I want people to know my side of the story.”