Page 70 of Alpha Fate

I can’t. This is real.

The walls of the room feel like they’re closing in on me. It’s only been days since I arrived here in Steel Lakes. It feels like a lifetime. I’ve been through so much since the abduction from Wildview, the drugged haze in Rack’s cells, and Gage… Gage who stormed into my life like a force of nature and swept me up in his whirlwind.

Gage and I…we’ve got something undeniable between us – a mate bond that’s as real as the ground beneath my feet. It’s an unquestionable fact within our wolf lore, and even without firm memories to grasp onto, I know I’ve seen it among our kind – the way two souls can recognize each other, the way they just know. I knew with Gage. I know I did. And when you find your fated mate, you’re supposed to hold on tight and never let go.

But now…everything is different.

I rub my eyes, feeling tears threaten to spill over. It’s not just about me anymore. There’s another life – lives – to consider. Lives tied to a male I can’t remember clearly, whose face comes to me in dreams blurred around the edges like an old photograph left out in the sun.

A traitor. That’s what I feel like – a traitor to Cole, to myself, and now to Gage.

Oh, God. Gage!

When he finds out about this, when he realizes that I’m carrying another male’s pups… He’s going to freak out. He might reject me; his bonded mate has another’s offspring growing inside her.

I can’t breathe.

“No, this isn’t right,” I groan into my palms. This isn’t how things were supposed to go. After all that’s gone wrong in my world, can’t this one thing go right? Don’t I deserve this?

Probably not. Maybe this is how I’m being punished for being a terrible person.

I need to make this right; I need to find Wildview again and find Cole – my chosen before all this madness began – and figure this out.

And most of all, I need to consider the future of my babies. They need a father who will accept them as his own. Cole is their father by blood; whatever I feel about him, I have to accept that. Besides, I can’t see Gage ever accepting them. It’s too much to ask.

“Sav?” The door’s cracked open, and Sierra pokes her head in. “You okay?” There’s so much tenderness in her voice that I want to cry all over again. I have to stop that. It’s time to be strong.

“Yeah.” I manage a tight smile. “I’ll be fine. Just need to pull myself together, you know?”

“I understand.” Sierra’s face brightens. “How ‘bout some ice cream? That solves everything, right?”

I blink at her.

Sure it does. Not.

“Okay. Sounds like a good idea.”

I glance at the door as Sierra leaves with a soft click; I can’t help her for trying to cheer me up. Her kindness twists something inside me because she doesn’t know the truth yet. What I’m about to do.

I stand up abruptly and start gathering my things – a few clothes thrown into a bag without care for folding or order. My hands shake, but I steady them with effort; now’s not the time for fear or hesitation.

I slip into my squeaky new trainers and tie my hair back from my face. Every second counts; every moment I delay is another where someone could notice my absence and come looking for me.

I remember how Gage described the patrols when he recounted his stories of being part of Jagger’s security team when we were meeting in secret – the times they come and go from Steel Lakes etched into my memory from when he’d speak passionately about keeping us safe from harm.

Now, that knowledge is going to help me escape from here – from him.

I shoulder my bag and take one last look at the room that was supposed to be a sanctuary, but now feels more like a beautifully adorned prison cell. My heart aches for what I’m about to do – for leaving without saying goodbye – but it’s necessary.

There’s an ache deep within me that won’t be soothed until I find answers, until I confront Cole – if he’s even alive – and face whatever comes next head-on.

“Goodbye,” I whisper as I shut the door behind me. I don’t know who I’m speaking to. Gage? Sierra? The life I’m leaving behind?

All of it.

The hallways are almost empty as I creep through them with silent steps. Those who hurry past don’t seem to pay much attention to me, thankfully. But each corner that I turn has me holding my breath as I expect to run into someone who might stop me.

When I reach a secondary exit that leads out of Steel Lakes, I glance back toward the heart of the town where this pack had welcomed me. Now, they’re completely unaware of the drama unfolding within me.