Page 108 of Head Over Heels

He rested his open palm on her stomach. “Do you want to tell me?”

She blinked at him, her dark eyes luminous and filled with secrets. “Tell you what?”

“Whatever it is in your past that makes you leery?” He brushed a kiss over her lips. “I want to know. I’ve been waiting for you to be ready.”

She tugged the sheet higher. “You have?”

“I have.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know if I can say it.”

“I think you can. I think you want to. You’re just afraid. But don’t worry, I have you.”

Her brow furrowed. “I actually believe that.”

“Because it’s true.”

She took a deep breath. “I’ve never had that before.”

He pulled her close. “You have it now.”

“It scares me.” She shivered against him. “I don’t want to lose myself in you.”

“You won’t.” He kissed her temple. “You’re too strong for that.”

She was vulnerable right now. Maybe more vulnerable than he’d ever seen her. The desire to protect her, to comfort her sat heavy in his chest.

She clutched at his arm. “That’s where you’re wrong.”

Arm curled around her waist, he tightened his hold on her. “Tell me, and it will lose some of its power over you.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because confession is good for the soul.”

“Maybe.” She bit her bottom lip and sighed. “I want to tell you.”

“And I want to hear. So let it all go, darlin’. I’ll catch you, I promise.”

She nodded. “You know my parents left as soon as I was eighteen.”

“I do.”

“It wasn’t like they gave me a ton of supervision, but they were still around. But suddenly there I was, still a kid, off on her own. I was as crazy as you would think I’d be. I partied, hooked up with guys, was up for anything. It was fun, or at least that’s what I told myself. All manic, wild energy. I loved anything dangerous and risky. When I met Tony, he was everything I’d ever wanted in a guy.” She darted her gaze up to him. “He was so dangerous, so exciting.”

As her words clicked into place with what he understood about her, things started to make sense. He nodded, wanting her to continue. “Go on.”

“It started just as you’d expect. We met at a party, and from the second we laid eyes on each other, it was game on. We were like glue from that moment.” She cleared her throat, shrugging. “It was crazy. We were crazy. And it felt like I’d finally found my person. That thing I’d lost when Maddie had her accident suddenly found a new home, only it was better because it was with my boyfriend.”

“I understand,” he murmured, not wanting to interrupt her too much and ruin her flow.

“Over time, things started to change. He started making excuses not to see me, or canceling plans. Sometimes he’d show up hours late, and when I called him on it, he’d tell me I was crazy. I thought he was cheating on me, and he made me believe I was nuts. It went on and on until my life became about him, and his moods, and how he felt about me that day.” She smiled, all sad and full of loss.

Ryder squeezed her tighter, wishing he could take it all away from her. “It’s okay. Get it all out.”

She clutched at the sheet, her knuckles whitening. “Of course he was cheating on me. He made me dependent on him and then made me feel insane for being addicted. It was awful.” A tear slipped down her cheek. “And you know the worst thing?”

“What’s that?” He smoothed his hand over her tense muscles.