Page 55 of Take

“Xamien didn’t know. He still doesn’t,” Jasper said, and then turned and walked out the front door.

I pushed Holden away from me, staggering back until I crashed into the wall. Sobs racked my body as the anger turned to pain and I collapsed onto the floor. I thought I was strong. I thought I was stronger, but I felt like I did living with Drake. An object. Used and beaten. Maybe this time it wasn’t physical wounds, but this was worse. Jasper had reeled me in, made me feel safe and strong, and alive before he cast me out into an ocean of starving sharks.

I lay on the floor for a long time. The crying stopped and the cold numbness slowly seeped back in. I didn’t open my eyes as arms lifted me up and carried me to the bedroom, and then lay me in the bed. I knew it was Jasper. I’d always know when he was near. I had right from the beginning. And I knew he never left the bedroom, but stayed sitting on the window ledge. It was then I finally slept.

“Baby, wake up.”

So cold. Why was it so cold? I couldn’t stop shaking. I tried to pry my eyes open but they wouldn’t open. Drake hovered over me sneering with his hand outstretched.

“No. No, don’t touch me.” I didn’t want this.

Don’t make me.

His arms came around me and I screamed, pushing at him, struggling to get away. I had to fight. I needed to fight him. I hadn’t fought him last time. But I was stronger now. I wouldn’t let him win.

“Max. Wake the fuck up!”

I jolted at the sound of his voice and my eyes flew open. “Jasper?” He had his arms around me and we were on the floor, me between his legs as he cradled me to him. “Jasper.” I tried to escape his arms as everything came flooding back, one nightmare replaced with another.

“Shh, relax. You’re not going anywhere.” His tone hardened as he whispered in my ear, “And neither am I.” He held me tightly to him and his warmth seeped into my trembling body. I didn’t want to feel comfort from him, but I did and that made it worse. I was being comforted by the man hired to kill me.

“I’d never kill you.”Jasper’s words intimately caressed my mind and it was as though he was inside me. “Fuck, I could never hurt you, baby.”

But he had.

I closed my eyes as he locked me to him, refusing to let me go. My fingers clutched at his shirt, and his heart beat solid and steady beneath my hand.

“I got you.” His gentle words pulled me into him, despite trying to fight it. A finger stroked back my damp hair from my face and tucked it behind my ear. “I can’t take back what I did, Max. It was a job and I didn’t know . . .” He sighed and tugged me a little closer. “I didn’t know I’d care this much.”

I searched his words for the truth, but I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t trust him. “It doesn’t matter now.” Because it was too late. Anything that had begun to build had been ripped apart and stomped on.

“No,” Jasper said abruptly. I jerked at the fierceness in his tone. “It’s not too late.”

He’d read my thoughts. Oh, God, he’d found a way through the cracks. I pulled against him, shoving at his chest. “Don’t you dare. You don’t have the right to read my thoughts. You don’t have the—”

He kissed me.

At first I was shocked as his aggressive mouth met mine, one hand holding the back of my head to prevent my escape. My lips were soft against his, the twinge between my legs pulsating, my stomach whirling with flutters of winged angels.

Then sanity stabbed me in the chest and I tried to yank back, but his grip was relentless and he titled my head and forced me to accept him. To let him back in.

His lips vibrated beneath mine as he spoke. “Please.” It was a haggard pleading that tore another piece off me because whatever had been happening between us was lost to the murky lies.

I went limp against him, mouth unmoving as he kissed me. He stopped and rested his forehead against mine as he breathed heavily. My lips tingled and felt swollen. I ran my tongue over them, immediately tasting him and regretting it.

“She followed me one night to the river where I’d go swimming sometimes. We weren’t allowed to leave our Talde at night because of the threat of vampires and we . . . well, we weren’t strong enough yet.” His voice was quiet and unsteady. “Holden used to get so pissed at me when I went out at night. He was always the practical one and I hated rules.”

His hand slid down my back and settled on my hip. “I didn’t think there was any harm in her coming with me. There’d been no sign of vampires in months. I was pretty . . . confident in my Sounding ability and I thought . . . I thought I was strong enough at sixteen. I wasn’t.” He stumbled over the last words and cleared his throat, his hand tensing on me for a second before he started talking again. “I didn’t even make it to the river before I heard her muffled scream from behind me. My world collapsed hearing that sound. It shredded me, but it was nothing compared to what happened over the next few days.” He glanced at me and tears filled his eyes, but they didn’t fall, just pooled in his bottom lids. “They wanted to know where Lillian, a really powerful Healer, was. I wouldn’t tell them. I’d never give in. But then her screams . . . my sister’s cries . . .” He dropped his head forward and his voice lowered. “Three days. I told them where Lillian’s Talde was after three days. They promised to let Beth go, but I knew they wouldn’t. Fuck, I knew they wouldn’t and I told them anyway because I hoped maybe . . . fuck, maybe they would just kill me and let her go.”

I should’ve got up and walked way, but I didn’t. I sat in his lap as he told me the devastating story of what happened to his ten-year-old sister. The torture he endured, the suffering as he hung from the tree for days, listening to her cries and begging. Then his sister being tossed like garbage into a shallow grave right in front of him. The laughter as they kicked dirt over her lifeless body. “My parents . . . their grief . . . it ruined them. I had to leave. I couldn’t watch what I’d done to them anymore. I never saw them again and I spent the next years hunting the vampires who killed Beth. And every day I did, I cared less and less about . . . everything. It was easier that way. To never care about anything . . . anyone again.” His hand found mine and he linked our fingers. “I’ve lived that way every single day since—until you.”

I had no words and I didn’t think I could speak them as his story settled into me. I knew what Beth had suffered. Maybe my story was different, but I knew the fear she must have felt before she died. We’d been the same age, taken from those we loved, our home.

But his story didn’t change anything.

I crawled out of his lap and he let me. I stood on shaky legs and looked down at him sitting on the floor looking completely . . . vulnerable with sadness misted in his eyes and his mouth drawn downward. But it didn’t matter anymore.

“You’re Xamien’s friend. He trusts you.” I tilted my chin up as I thought of the day I met Jasper. “I wasn’t a stranger, Jasper. You met me six months ago and yet still you took a deal to use me for my ability. A job with the possibility that you’d have to kill me.”

Jasper’s face blanched and I heard his sharp inhale. “Max, fuck. I wouldn’t have done it—”

I snorted and I raised my brows. “That’s not good enough. I’m sorry for what happened to your sister. But sharing why you’re the bastard you are . . . doesn’t change the fact.” I spun on my heel and walked out of the bedroom.