Page 42 of Ice Falls

“I suppose ‘the means’ was the avalanche.” Lila frowned as she buckled an iridescent orange fanny pack around her waist. “Or maybe how it was triggered? If it was? It does seem like an odd choice when everyone around here has a gun.”

“But guns can be traced, with ballistics and such, and that might not be ruled an accident.”

Lila shivered. “Poor Daniel. I just hate thinking about him in that truck.”

“Then don’t,” Molly suggested. “Focus on learning more about him at The Fang. I’ll do the same.”

“You’re coming to The Fang tonight?”

“No. The opposite.”

Puzzled, Lila cocked her head. “What’s the opposite?”

“I’m going to an AA meeting.”

cry.

When Molly had left home for college, the first thing she’d done was seek out an Al-Anon meeting. She’d gone to a few AA meetings as well, in support of a friend, and to hold her own feet to the fire. Alcoholism ran in her family, and it scared the shit out of her.

Her instincts about Kathy had been correct. After some discreet questioning, the store owner invited her to the next AA meeting, which was held in the storage room at the back of the grocery store. Surrounded by racks filled with cases of canned beans and sacks of rice, six people sat on folding chairs.

Molly knew everyone would be welcomed, even a stranger from New York. But she also knew the others might be suspicious because she was always coming in and out of The Fang.

So at the first opportunity, she rose and introduced herself. “I’m Molly, and I grew up in a family of alcoholics. I was actually named after a drug. Not too many people can say that, right? Even so, or maybe because of all that, I don’t drink. I know it wouldn’t take much to turn me into an addict. So I handle my business as if I already am one. My friend works at a bar in town, and I’m in there a lot. I drink the tomato juice and that weird Clamato stuff, but I feel the temptation. I’m glad this group is here. It’s good to know there’s support.”

She sat down to a response of silent nods and a smile from a young woman with a crown of dark cornrows, who rose next and introduced herself as Toni. That was one thing about Firelight Ridge that had surprised her; it was more diverse than she would have imagined. The remoteness and wild beauty of the place drew all kinds of people.

She listened quietly as the other attendees shared their recent struggles. An elderly woman sobbed while talking about a letter from her daughter rescinding an invitation to visit. A young man spoke about how he’d been trying to shop for bread and cheese, and found himself staring at the beer cooler and picturing downing every ice cold can until it was empty. And then, finally, someone mentioned Daniel.

“I just can’t stop thinking about him,” burst out Toni. “He was trying so hard. He was one of us and I feel like I should have known if he was backsliding. But he wasn’t! He was doing good. Shit, if he can fall off the wagon like that, what’s going to happen to me? When I first heard they found bottles in his truck, I said no way, it has to be a mistake. He didn’t even like whiskey!”

“That’s right, he was allergic to the hard stuff,” someone else chimed in.

“No crosstalk,” warned Kathy, who was taking her turn as the facilitator, a role they rotated each week.

“But this is different. Can we just end the meeting and talk about Daniel? He deserves some conversation, you know?”

Everyone agreed to that, and with the meeting officially at an end, the group spent some time doing what Molly had hoped they’d do. They talked about Daniel.

The group struggled to believe that he’d fallen off the wagon.

“Everything was finally going his way,” Toni kept saying. “Out of all of us, he’s the last person who would slip.”

“But sometimes those are the people who do,” said a young man with tribal tattoos. “We’ve all seen it. You get close to your dream and you’re so scared it won’t work out that you screw it up.”

“His dream of being a plow truck driver?” Toni scoffed. “That was just a way to make money.”

“No. His dream to write for a magazine.” Tattoo Guy flipped Toni the bird, but she took no offense. “He was just about to send it in. He didn’t know if anyone would want it, but he was gonna try.”

A magazine story…Molly’s ears perked up. Maybe that was what he’d wanted to see her about. That sounded like an honest-to-goodness clue. She needed to get her hands on it.

Molly raised her hand, and everyone turned toward her in surprise, as if they’d forgotten a newcomer was present. “I didn’t know Daniel beyond one short conversation, but I do have some contacts in the magazine world in New York. If you guys want, I can see if one of them would be interested in publishing his piece posthumously.”

“I’d love to see his dream fulfilled.” Toni pushed her tortoiseshell glasses up her nose. “But it should be up to his family or whoever he left in charge of his, you know, estate.”

“Estate.” Kathy scoffed. Molly could see she was the truth-teller of the group. “You mean that old trapper cabin he fixed up and his plow truck?”

“And his D9.”