Page 98 of Talk Swoony to Me

She bristles. “Are you sure?”

“Uh... yeah.” I chuckle. “I’m sure.”

“Because I heard some noises the other night that seem to indicate otherwise.”

I hold my breath. “What noises?”

“A moan here. A squeak of the mattress there. A heated grunt — my favorite by far, by the way.”

I look down, my cheeks on fire. “We did... some stuff.”

“Mouth stuff? Thrusty stuff?” she asks. “What we talking about here?”

I scoff, amused. “How do you talk about this so casually?”

“Casual sex is, by definition, casual.”

“Drew and I aren’t casual,” I point out. “And we didn’t have sex.”

Her brow arches. “You didn’t?”

“No.”

“Then, what were you doing in there? P90X?”

I chuckle as I search for the right words. “Hand... stuff.”

“Hand stuff?” she repeats. “Over the clothes, dry-humping kind of stuff?”

“Like...” I lower my voice as more students enter the room. “Naked in bed together, tender kisses and touching… stuff.”

“Did you come?”

I flinch at her volume. “Jenna!” I snap with a whisper.

“Right. Sorry.” She clears her throat. “Did you swell in a glorious climax as your hearts beat as one?”

I roll my eyes. “Yes.”

“Him, too?”

“Yes. We… came together.” I bite my lip, feeling the memory all over again. “Twice.”

She pauses for a moment, then nods. “That’s some sexy shit,” she says.

“It was nice and romantic and I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I remain a virgin.”

“Ah, yes. The technical virgin argument.”

I shrug. “We didn’t have sex.”

“You lied down naked together and brought each other to mutual, simultaneous orgasm. You, my friend, had some sex.”

“But we didn’t have sex sex,” I argue.

“You have got to stop giving so much meaning to vaginal intercourse. It’s such a small part of sex! It’s not even the best part of sex.”

I pause. “It’s not?”