Page 46 of Broken
She crawls out from under my touch and jumps over the back of the couch. I push up off the floor to watch her pace. “I spent two months thinking I was fucking crazy for even thinking about having a baby, let alone doing it by myself. The things I thought,” She points to her temple, “I wanted to end it all, both mine and the baby’s lives because I truly thought I wasn’t worth loving again. Knox fucked me over, but you broke me into a million pieces.”
She lets out a scream, “I thought I hated you when we were little because you picked on me, but at that moment, I was convinced, this was you getting another one over me. The biggest prank of all, spend all that time with the girl you claim to love, get her pregnant and then fucking leave her completely behind.”
“I didn’t know!” I shout back at her as she lets go, letting everything flow from her. Her head falls back as she takes a deep breath in and lets out a long scream. When she’s finished, she looks at me and shakes her head. “You bought me a plane ticket and sent me on my way, telling me to move on. What was I supposed to do about that? I couldn’t be your friend, I couldn’t talk to you. It hurt too much.”
“I tried to tell you, for weeks. George told me you had already found someone else. That you didn’t want my broken emo ass, that I wasn’t worth your time anymore.” She clutches her hands to her chest, gripping her shirt as she tells me what it was like for her. “I can’t, no I won’t go through that again. I’m finally in a good place. Mentally, physically, emotionally. I cannot have you come in here and promise the same things you did last time only to wreck me again.”
“I tried to make it work, remember, you cut me out. Told me that I didn’t belong with you. I wanted you to come with me, to make a life together. You told me no. You said no Katherine. So I took you at your word, you said you didn’t love me, so I didn’t hang around to get my heart shattered further.”
“You changed your number.”
“You wouldn’t stop texting me, acting like we were besties, asking how I was doing when all I wanted to was leap from the tallest point of the school and end it all. You were my first, my everything. I wanted you so much that when you told me you didn’t love me, I thought that I would never find peace again.”
She stops moving as I feel my own fucking tears falling down my cheeks, this woman is fucking crazy thinking she was the only one hurt. “You deserved better.”
“No, Kitty, I deserved the truth. You loved me and you hated yourself so much that you wouldn’t let it happen. Convinced yourself that I couldn’t possibly love you.”
“I-” She snaps her mouth shut.
“Exactly, not once did I ever lie to you, not once did I hide my feelings. Yes, I fucked up when we were kids and did some dumb shit, but I thought we had grown past that. I wanted you to come with me,” I close the gap between us, walking around the couch. “I love you, Katherine Marie Sherman, even if you don’t want to hear it. I love you for exactly who you are.”
“Sherman.” She blinks away more tears. “We’re married.” She blinks rapidly.
“And you gave your daughter my last name.” I say with a smile, feeling the anger leave the room.
“She’s our daughter. I wanted her to know who her father was, even if he was just an imaginary person.”
“I’m flesh and blood babe, right here, ready to make this all right.” Putting my hands around her head so my thumbs are just under her jaw, I lift her face too look at me, locking her there so she can see just how fucking serious I am. “Right here, right now.” I press my lips to hers, feeling the warmth of her skin and the cool metal of her lips rings.
God damn, I love this woman and everything feels right when I’m near her, my body doesn’t feel foreign, my words feel like truth, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I belong with her.
Chapter Nineteen
Katherine
I’ve been distracted all day at work. I left Bailey and McKenna at home and asked West to find something to do until I got off work. I didn’t want them spending time together until I’m ready for that to happen. Everything is so fucking raw and ripped open right now that I’m not thinking clearly. Which means, according to my therapist, I’m not allowed to make decisions. Her favorite words to me are, when you feel emotional, put all big decisions on the back burner. I should probably call her, this is a big thing, and I’m not sure how I’m supposed to handle it. My medications have been working just fine, so I know I’m not off kilter. This is all real emotions, real life. And I’m not sure I can handle everything West is promising right now.
“Kitty.” Devon, one of the tattoo artists, pops into the back office where I’ve hidden most of the day.
“Yeah?” I ask, looking up at the black screen of my laptop. I’m supposed to be making schedules for the interns, but instead I’m just blanking out on it.
“There’s a guy at the front asking for you.” Devon’s smiles at me, her perfectly lined white teeth shine. She’s got three tattoo’s lined up for today, and I’m not sure where she’s at on her day, which means either she’s just finished one, or is waiting for one to come in.
“Okay.” I close the laptop and head onto the main floor, when I turn the corner, I see West standing there. Waiting for me.
“He’s hot.” Devon elbows me on the side as she whispers.
“Yes. Yes he is.” I study him, standing there with a black dress bag standing over his shoulder as he looks at the art on the wall. He’s wearing his trademark baby pink. It’s a button down, with the sleeves rolled up and a pair of tan slacks.
I move towards him, a stupid smile on my face. “What are you doing here?” I ask.
He turns to face me. “Is this all your work?” He points to a picture of a skull I drew my first year here.
“Most of it is.”
“It's beautiful, Kitty.” He turns his whole body to face me. “We have dinner reservations. I looked up the time you close the shop, Bailey says you’re usually out of here about twenty minutes after close.
“It’s not closing time.” I say lifting a brow at him.