Page 71 of Daddy's Lesson

I wasn’t sure what was up with Theo lately, but apparently my problems tonight had triggered some of his own. I was about to tell him we weren’t the same and to sit down and shut up when he said the thing I needed to hear.

“Just… seriously man, fuck that. She owes you an explanation. When you’re sober and she’s not triggered. If you guys really had something good going, you can’t let it get derailed by one big misunderstanding. If she's your woman, if you’re her Daddy, like for real, and it’s not just about the contract and the money and this damn Rent-A-Daddy bullshit, then you need to chase after her like a Daddy would. When his babygirl is upset, a Daddy doesn’t back down just because she’s lashing out. He doesn’t give up just because things are hard, and giving up is easy. That woman, that broken, angry woman that was in here… Lennon, she needs a Daddy. Not just any Daddy. Her Daddy. And that’s you.”

Theo was going off now. He’d paced closer and closer to me during his speech until we were nearly standing nose to nose, and he poked his finger into my chest. “That’s you, man. So the question is, what are you going to do about it?”

“Damn,” Nyla said softly from somewhere beside me. “That was… kinda beautiful.”

Jasmine nodded.

“It really was,” Audrey agreed.

“I almost hate to admit it,” I agreed, “but, that was actually really helpful.”

“Yeah. Damn straight it was.” Theo grabbed a nearby chair and slammed it against the floor for effect.

Archer covered his ears. “Fuck, man. Will you stop doing that?”

“Sorry.” Theo’s response was delivered with a sheepish grin and for the first time in a long time, he looked like himself instead of the angry, drunk, impossible-to-be-around monster of a man he’d been for the last several months. “I just… You know what? I think I needed to hear that, too.” He stood there, still for a moment, blinking, with a stunned expression on his face. Then he smiled, actually kissed my cheek with his big, slobbery lips, wished me good luck, and ran from the room leaving the seven of us staring after him.

“What. The. Fuck?” Bas finally demanded.

Bain and Archer shrugged while Nyla and Jasmine giggled.

“Was that actually helpful?” Audrey asked me.

I raised my eyebrows at her. “I think it was. Unless you think it’s bad advice…” Even if she said it was, I’d probably take it, anyway, but I still wanted to know.

“Fighting for your woman is never bad advice,” she answered carefully. “Just maybe take Theo’s advice, but not his words. Refrain from calling her impossible, or a full-time job.”

“Right. Thanks for that.” I stood and made my way toward the door, but was stopped in my tracks when someone grabbed the back of my shirt.

“Not. Tonight.” Archer was using his Dom voice on me again. It made me want to go now just to spite him, but I knew he was right. Zoe needed time, and I needed to sober up. Going now would just make the problem worse.”

I sat and downed the drink Archer had poured for me. It seemed I was going to be drinking a lot less from here on out, so I figured I’d enjoy it while I had the chance, since tonight was already a big, fat L, anyway.

CHAPTER 18

Zoe

I barely slept. I’d tossed and turned all night, while Lennon’s words played in my head on repeat. Had I really not made it clear to him how deep my issues with alcohol went? I was sure I had, at the time, but I also hadn’t been thinking clearly. I’d seen that bottle on the table, then watched Lennon stumble as he greeted me, and I’d lost the plot almost immediately.

All of a sudden, he hadn’t been my patient, loving Daddy who was working hard to bring out the best in me, and help me find my way back to my true self. His image had been clouded by memories and experiences of things much darker.

It was almost like I’d been the one who was drunk for all the clarity I’d exhibited. I’d made a damn fool of myself, and of him too, in his own club, then screamed my insistence that I never wanted to see him again as I’d stormed out.

Once I’d gotten home and the fog had cleared and the tears had stopped falling, I’d realized that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Of course, it was too late. Were my actions a form of self-sabotage? I’d been known to do it in my youth, but I thought I’d long since outgrown it. As I lay in my bed in the jammies Daddy had picked out for me, hugging my tear-soaked pillow, it didn’t seem like I had.

I was certain now I hadn’t told him how strongly I felt about alcohol. I certainly hadn’t asked him not to drink. But I had made an absolute ass of myself.

A fresh wave of sobs racked my body. I wished for a time machine, a reset button, anything that would allow me to go back in time and handle last night differently. Anything that would keep me from pushing away the best thing that had happened to me in a long time.

I was pretty sure no reset button existed. There was nothing I could do to fix the things I’d said. Lennon, though over a decade younger than me and a former student, had been everything to me. Everything I needed, everything I wanted. Just… everything.

After doing nothing but merely existing for so many years, after staying in a passionless marriage, after losing myself…. In Lennon’s care, in only a few weeks, I’d been thriving. I felt like a young woman again, and more like myself than I ever remembered feeling. And the sexual awakening… with him I’d found a sensual, sexy side of myself I hadn’t known existed. He’d opened my eyes to so many new experiences, and I’d lapped them up like a newborn kitten laps up milk.

And now I had to find a way to keep being that person. Without my Daddy. I was pretty sure I could do it, simply because I couldn’t afford not to. I loved the person I’d become too much to go back to being a shell of myself.