Page 31 of Passion

“So you’re staying the night there?”

“Yeah. Clayton didn’t come home.”

“I know you see what he’s doing. You need to just bring the kids home with you.”

“You’re right, Gentry, and I want to do that, but at the same time, I know the turmoil and drama will only get worse if I do. I promise to file for custody Monday.”

“A’ight, Giselle. Whatever. Talk to you tomorrow.”

Gentry ended the call before I could respond. He was pissed. He rarely called me Giselle. It was usually Elle or baby. I was upset, too, because I desperately wanted to do what he suggested. I felt like Clayton did this shit on purpose. He knew he needed to get back home so I could go home. I wanted to cry because I didn’t like Gentry being angry with me.

However, I could see what this was doing to us. He wasn’t as affectionate with me. We rarely saw each other. He was still taking a lunch break on Fridays, but it was like we were just friends instead of husband and wife. We fucked whenever I found the time. He was no longer making love to me. I could feel the difference, but I knew that was a direct response to what I was giving out.

I needed to just let him go until I got this shit straight and pray like hell that he was still available when I did. “Mommy, are you okay?”

I turned to see Kizzie standing next to me. She assumed I was still trying to get the house together and kept telling me to hurry so they could come home. She missed her princess bed. I assured her that it shouldn’t be much longer, but the truth was, I just didn’t know. Gentry was pulling away from me, and it was all my fault.

I was just trying to spare my children the pain I was feeling. Clayton had been my best friend for twenty-three years. I didn’t understand why he would flip the script like this. He told me that he and Gentry had gotten along tonight, and if they kept spending time around each other, he could see the kids going home with me soon.

I glanced at my baby again and said, “Mommy’s okay, baby. Where’s Dakota?”

“He’s playing with his blocks. Dakota!” she yelled.

I slowly shook my head. She embodied the full big sister attitude. Dakota didn’t stand a chance. He ran into the front room where we were and fell on my lap. I was sitting on the floor in front of the couch. I hugged him tightly, seeking solace in my child’s love. It helped for a moment. When he pulled away from me, he said, “I go pay bocks!”

I chuckled. He was going to play with his blocks. He had some trouble with those L’s when they were paired with another consonant. Kizzie came back into the room with her tiara and wand. She sat next to me and asked, “Who’s Gentry?”

My heart sank at her question. “He’s someone I like, nosy.”

“Oooooh! Is he your boyfriend?” she asked then giggled.

This little girl stayed in my business. I wanted to tell her the truth, but if I did, that would bring that trauma right to her little mind. She would think I chose him over them. That wasn’t the case at all. If it were, I wouldn’t be here every day to spend time with them. I didn’t come last Saturday, because I needed to wash and clean up, mainly after myself. I could tell my mess was rubbing Gentry raw. He was very neat, and normally, I was too.

This stress was taking me down slowly, and it didn’t seem like I’d be able to do anything to stop it. I glanced at Kizzie as she waited for a response, so I said, “Something like that.”

“When will Kota and me get to meet him?”

“Kota and I.”

“When will Kota and I get to meet him?”

“Hopefully soon, baby.”

She jumped up and down as my phone rang. When I saw Vegas’s number, I got nervous. He called me at least once a week, but he always knew shit I didn’t think he knew. “Hello?”

“What it do, G?”

“Hey. How are you?”

“I’m good, but you don’t sound that good. What’s going on? That nigga fucking up?”

“No, he’s been perfect.”

“I’m not talking about Gentry. I’m talking about Clayton.”

My eyebrows lifted. I didn’t know how he knew to ask about Clayton. “Umm…”

“Don’t bullshit me, sis. I called Gentry, and we talked briefly. When I asked where you were, he said you were at Clayton’s house. The only reason you would be there is if that nigga hasn’t given you your kids back.”