Page 4 of Left on Read
I took it.
“How many profiles do people see on those sites? Hundreds, thousands, right?”
“Yeah.”
“So, imagine you’re a woman looking for a date. You go on your rusty trusty app and see a text photo looking for”—he pulled his attention from the bin and shot me some side eye—“a woman who’s willing to sell tools to a dude with no pic or personal info.” He went back to rummaging around. “It’s giving no-faced serial killer vibes.”
“Shit.” My shoulders fell. “I wouldn’t answer me either. It’s like the perfect setup to be on a true crime podcast. I might as well drive around in a white van with ‘free puppies’ painted on it.”
“Exactly. Aha!” Nick jumped up and waved a fake hard hat and the matching plastic tool belt triumphantly. “Time for a photoshoot!”
“A photoshoot with work props?” I asked slowly.
Nick smiled patiently and waited while I connected the dots.
“Oh, I get it! I should add a few pics of me with tools because I’m looking for tools. That’s a lot less serial killer than my last attempt.”
Nick snatched a pair of worn jeans off the rack and shoved them at me. “Put these on, and we’ll get this done before either of us has to get back on stage and shake our asses for tips.”
I shoved down my sweats and yanked on the jeans. They were tight in the thighs and ass, but that was typical for most pants that fit my waist.
“Shirt off.”
I yanked off my t-shirt.
“Now these.” Nick handed me the props and took my clothes.
I donned the hard hat and clipped the fake tool belt around my waist.
“And this.” He waved a hammer in my face.
“Careful.” I snatched the hammer out of his hand. “Not a prop. Very real and solid.”
“Oh, right.” Nick smiled bashfully. “My bad.”
“That innocent look might work on everyone else, but not on me.”
“Or me.” Gray, another of our best friends, squeezed into the closet behind me. “Having a secret meeting?”
“Nope, just helping River step up his dating profile game.”
Gray looked me up and down. “And the outfit is for…”
“He’s a stripper and a tool guy. Makes sense to combine the two into one photo, no?” Nick asked innocently.
I bit my lip so I didn’t ruin Nick’s master plan and say something that would give away the real reason we were doing this. Gray would laugh his ass off at the whole situation, but I didn’t want to risk it getting back to Zane.
“Tool-wielding guy?” Gray shot Nick an affectionate grin.
“Sue me.” Nick shrugged. “I forgot the word for construction worker. But that’s such a broad term. There should be a fancy way to say that. Like he’s good with his hands and can build you a house. Oh! That should be your next bio. I mean, the bio you put on that other app that’s not this one.”
“I feel like I walked onstage of a play, but no one gave me the script.” Gray looked between us.
“That’s pretty much every day for me,” I said.
“Doesn’t matter.” Nick waved dismissively. “Point is, we’re going for sexy construction worker.”
“Then you nailed it.” Gray slapped my ass hard enough to sting. “Now move this house-building ass outta the way so I can get my fireman outfit. I gotta lot of fires to put out…with my dick.” He made a cheesy face and grabbed at his crotch.