Page 9 of Waiting to Love You
“Sure thing. It was nice seeing you again, Bristol.” Seth smirks at me, then heads out the back door.
“That man is head over heels for you,” Leia says as she pretends to fan herself.
I roll my eyes at her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Let’s go say hello to your dad.”
I try to focus on making it over to the couch, where Mr. Armstrong is sitting, without tripping over my feet, but I can feel Seth watching me as I walk past the French doors leading to the deck. His gaze caresses my skin as it travels down my body, like he’s trying to commit my features to memory.
“He’s just another pretty face. He isn’t the first and won’t be the last,” I mumble quietly to myself as I take a seat on the couch beside Mr. Armstrong.
I’m not a bad-looking woman by any means, so Seth isn’t the first man to find appeal in the way I look, but there is something about the way he looks at me that’s different. It’s as if he can see me, see my soul, not just the superficial parts most men search for.
“Are you sure you don’t need anything?”
My head snaps to the right at the sound of Leia’s voice. I watch her fuss over her dad, asking if he’s warm enough or if we can get him anything, being her usual mothering self. However, Mr. Armstrong isn’t having any of that.
“I said I was fine, Sugarplum. Don’t worry so much.”
“I’ll always worry about you, Dad.”
“It’s my job to worry about you, not the other way around.” He huffs, crossing his arms over his chest, which causes me to giggle softly.
My eyes instantly wander back toward the French doors, locking with Seth’s over Riggs’s shoulder. I lick my bottom lip as I watch him lift a beer toward his mouth and wink. The temperature in the room seems to go up a few degrees as we continue to stare at each other. Neither of us dare to look away. It’s just like the first time we met. All the sounds in the room seem to disappear, making it feel like we are the only two people in the universe.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
I’ve never had such a visceral reaction to a man, no matter how gorgeous he is. But with Seth, it’s different somehow. He calls to me in a way no other man ever has with just one look. It’s as if my soul has finally found its other half.
Why the hell does he have to be in the military?
I know most people would think this is a ridiculous reason to keep distance between Seth and me. Especially since the chemistry between us is undeniable. But growing up, it was just me and my younger sister, Melissa, until Audrey moved in with us. My mom did try to be there for us and anticipate everything we needed but my dad was never around, choosing his military career over everything else. Sure, I get it. He has a job to protect our country. To make it safe for everyone, but what about our family? What about what we wanted and what was best for us?
We moved every couple of years, making it almost impossible to make friends or put down roots anywhere. With my dad being gone so much, he reminded me it was my responsibility as the oldest to help my mom hold down the fort when he was deployed, which was pretty much all the time. I had to help my sister with her homework, keep my grades up, and practically be the perfect child to ensure my mom had no added stress in her life. That’s a lot of shit to put on the shoulders of a little girl, and it took me a long time and a lot of therapy to realize that it wasn’t my responsibility. Sure, I should have been there to help my mom and sister when they needed it, but I was still a little girl. I had responsibilities to my family, but I also needed a chance to just be a kid. To make mistakes and learn from them.
This is one of the main reasons my father and I aren’t as close as we used to be. He was supposed to protect us, just like he vowed to do for everyone else in the country, but he put pressure on me to be perfect. Gave me the impression that I needed to become an adult long before my time in order to be there for my family, practically robbing me of the chance to be a child for as long as possible. I know my father loved all of us, but he loved being in the military more, and that’s a very hard pill to swallow. I refuse to be second fiddle in my relationship, so why even bother seeing where things between Seth and I could go?
“When are you going to stop kidding yourself, Bristol?”
“Huh?” My cheeks heat again as a deep chuckle filters in through the open window. I narrow my eyes at Seth before turning my entire body toward Leia so I can focus on what she’s saying to me.
“You haven’t heard a thing I’ve said, have you?”
I open my mouth to answer before snapping it shut. Sure, I could try and lie to her, but what’s the point? “Nope. Not a thing,” I reply with a smile, causing her to giggle softly.
“Just talk to him and see where things go.” Leia lays her hand on my shoulder, giving it a squeeze before spinning me around and shoving me toward the French doors. “Yes, he is a Marine, but he isn’t your dad.”
“I don’t know…” My voice trails off slightly as I spin around to face Leia. I pull my bottom lip between my teeth as I try to find the right word to explain my hesitancy. “Seth has the potential to be more than just a fling, and I don’t know if my heart can take being second in his life.”
“Wow. Okay,” Leia’s eyes widening in surprise before she wraps me in a tight hug. “But what if you do nothing?”
“Then I can protect my heart from being broken,” I reply quickly, not understanding where she’s going with this.
She pulls away from me. A soft smile spreads across her face as she takes a step back. “And you could regret it for the rest of your life.”
“I…” I begin, but Leia covers my mouth with her hand.
“Nope, it’s my time to talk. I’ve never once heard you talk about someone of the opposite sex like this. You’ve had flings, but that’s it. You’ve never worried about getting hurt or about what would happen when things went badly.”
Leia is right. I’ve been dreaming about the perfect man to sweep me off my feet. Someone who will make me the center of their universe and the most important person in their life. Because of those dreams, you can imagine how hard it’s been for me to date anyone. I’ve gone on dates and had my fair share of one-night stands, but nothing that lasted more than a few months at the most. I was always the one to break things off with them for a multitude of reasons, but mainly because I didn’t feel that spark with any of them. The all-consuming need to be near them every chance I got. The same feeling I’ve felt any time I’ve been in the same room as Seth Williams.