Page 79 of The Wild Man
“And just fuck all to your family and what we went through?”
I close my eyes and try to pull in a calming breath. I know they all went through hell, and I hate that they did, but if it wasn’t for the decisions I made, I never would have found Wild Man. I never would have experienced a love so deep and consuming. I won’t ever regret that or wish it didn’t happen, even if it meant I could take away the pain they went through.
“I’m sorry you went through that.” I open my eyes and look at Dad. “But if I could go back and change things, I wouldn’t.”
“Doc examined you while you were out those couple of days.” My gaze switches to Mad. His hands are shoved into his pockets, and I see the lumps of his fists. He looks just as upset and angry as Dad. “He said there was evidence of intercourse. Were you fucking him willingly?”
I flinch at his crass words.
“Maddox!” Rika shrieks, shock on her face. “Don’t be an asshole!”
I wait for Dad to intervene, but he doesn’t. He looks slightly uncomfortable, despite that his eyes say he’s waiting for my answer.
Maddox’s hard eyes move to Rika. “My sister. Not yours. You have no say in this.” His gaze moves back to me. “Well?”
“Not at first, but it wasn’t long before I was,” I reply truthfully. I won’t sugarcoat the facts, but I won’t lie to them either.
After shooting me a disgusted look, he storms from the room, slamming the door behind him. Ethan’s expression doesn’t appear much better than Mad, but at least it’s only disappointment on his face and not revulsion as he follows behind Mad.
Dad looks murderous. His jaw works back and forth and his hands are fisted by his sides. I don’t know if he’s angry at me because I wasn’t a willing participant at first or that I did become willing.
He says nothing as he continues to look at me for what seems like forever. I expect him to explode again or for him to approach and try to offer me comfort of some sort. He scrubs a hand over his face before he turns and walks out of my bedroom. The silent click of the door when he shuts it sounds louder than when Mad slammed it.
I angrily brush away my tears.
Disappointing my family is something I’ve always tried to avoid. Seeing that disquiet on Dad’s face as he left hurts worse than any words he could say. I feel like a failure of a daughter.
But they just don’t understand. Nothing I say could make them understand.
And it changes nothing.
My dad and brothers are tenacious and stubborn, but I’m of their blood, so I have the same traits.
Rika eyes me doubtfully, her expression sorrowful. “I don’t see you getting your way in this.”
“Then you’d be wrong,” I reply confidently. “But first, I need you to pick something up from the store for me.”
twenty-seven
Wild Man
I think something inside of me might be broken or at least cracked. The stack of bones that are on either side of my chest ache, especially on my right side. I have to take shallow breaths since deep ones feel like I’m being stabbed repeatedly from the inside. Even when I do, it still hurts to breathe. Not from my injuries, but because momor is gone.
My eyes aren’t as puffy, so I can see out of them now and the blackness that likes to put me to sleep hasn’t come back for a while. I think it’s been days since momor was taken because I’ve woken up several times with some of them being during the day and some at night.
Teeja has been with me each time I open my eyes. Lying the length of his warm body by my side at night when the coolness in the air leaves little bumps all over my body. He keeps Vena and the pups away. I think it’s because he doesn’t know if whatever attacked me is coming back. If he understood my words, I’d tell him not to worry. Momor’s family won’t be back. I’m sure when they left, they believed I was either dead or dying. Maybe I should be. Maybe if they did this to someone else, they would be. But I’m not letting go of my female so easily. I’ll fight even death to get her back.
Teeja has brought me food; small animals he’s killed. When I was first left on my own as a boy, I ate berries and bugs to stay alive. I was older the first time I killed an animal. I was so starved and sick of eating berries and bugs that I ripped into the small animal with tall ears, not caring what parts I ate, only that I wanted to fill my caved-in stomach. When I learned how to make a fire, I remembered Peepa putting food on top of the flames, so I did the same to the animals I killed. I had gotten used to eating meat raw, but I found I liked it much better over the fire. Since then, I can barely keep meat down if it’s not heated by flames. I’ve barely been able to move, so I haven’t been able to make a fire to cook the meat Teeja brings me. But I still eat it. To rebuild my strength so I can get to momor.
Food isn’t the only thing I need to consume though. Luckily, as uncomfortable as it’s been, it’s rained a couple of times. There was a small bowl on the ground near where I laid. With a lot of grunts and pain barely tolerable, I managed to drink the small amount of water gathered in the bowl.
Thankfully, the pain in my side isn’t as great today, and I’m able to move a little better.
I look down at my body and see all the dark spots on my chest and stomach. Most are marks under the skin where it looks like blood has come to the surface and can’t escape, but I do have a few cuts. They don’t look bad though.
I’ve managed to partially prop myself up against the log near where I make fires, and doing just that takes all of my breath, which makes the pain in my side worse.
Teeja whines close by, and I look at him. He’s sitting on his hind legs, his head tilted to the side. If he were human, I’d imagine he’d have a worried look on his face.