Page 41 of Wrapped in Hope
She shrugs one shoulder. “I can’t do it anymore. I just want to be with him.” There is no emotion behind her words. It’s like every feeling other than depression has been sucked out of her. Her eyes don’t hold the same shine they used to. Her voice is dull and raspy from going long periods of time without talking. And her cheeks are hollow while her skin is so pale it’s almost transparent.
I let out a long breath. “He’s gone, Jane. I said I would stay with you, but you had to try. You’re not trying. Do you even care for me at all anymore?”
“I don’t love you anymore, Holden. I can’t love anyone. And I don’t have the energy to try. I wish I could say I’m sorry for putting you through this, but I’m not. I feel nothing but pain and a constant reminder that I’ve lost my son.” Her eyes close like she just doesn’t have the energy to talk anymore.
* * *
I don’t even remember drivinghome. But here I am, sitting in my office chair with a drink in my hand. I’ve drunk more these past two days than I’ve drank in a year. But I have this anger that won’t leave. I have a hole in my heart that leaks blood every time it beats. I can’t shake the aggression I feel every time I think of Jane trying to kill herself, or when I think of how I took what I wanted from Hope and left her confused and even more broken than when I found her.
Maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m the reason these people are hurting. I do my best to make them better, but it seems all I do is hurt them more. Maybe if I wasn’t here, my wife of twenty years wouldn’t be lying in a hospital bed right now. Maybe Hope would have found someone else in the bar that night. Someone that would’ve been able to help her, not just steal from her. That’s all I’ve done. I’m a greedy bastard that took another piece of her, a piece she can’t afford to give.
Anger washes over me and without thinking, I pick up my desk chair and send it flying toward the window. The glass shatters and breaks before the chair falls through, hitting the ground outside. I grab what’s left of my whiskey off the desk and finish it before tossing the empty glass out of the window as well.
I have no idea where I’m going, but I grab my keys off the desk and head for the door. Just as I swing it open, I’m face to face with Hope.
* * *
A knocking on the door draws me out of my dead sleep. “Jane, get the door!” I yell, too lazy to get up.
The house is silent.
Fuck.
I push myself to my feet and swing open the door. Hope is standing on the other side.
“Hope?” I rub my hands over my tired eyes, trying to wake up.
She doesn’t say anything. She just leaps toward me, wrapping her arms around my chest. I hold my arms out to the side, not quite sure what’s going on.
“Are you okay, Hope? What’s going on?” My arms are still out, not touching her, but I look down to see the top of her dark hair.
“Dean and I got into a fight,” she says around sobs.
I let out a long breath. “Come inside and tell me what’s going on.”
She releases me and walks inside while I hold the door open for her.
She sits down on the couch and I sit beside her. “What happened? When I saw you two yesterday in the pool, you seemed fine.”
She nods as she wipes the tears from her cheeks. “It’s so stupid. I asked Dean what time he was picking me up for the Homecoming dance and he said he wasn’t going this year because he had to work. I was so angry. We had been planning on going, I already bought my dress and everything. I asked him why he picked up a shift when he knew it was homecoming and he said because he didn’t want to go.”
“Well that doesn’t sound like him. Did something happen to change his mind?”
She shakes her head. “No, he just decided that he didn’t want to go. He said he needed to save money. But anyway, I was angry and I told him that if he didn’t want to go with me that I would have Jake Warren take me.”
Now I’m lost in high school drama. “Who’s Jake Warren?”
She looks up through her long lashes. “He’s a guy at school that keeps flirting with me and asking me out. Dean hates him.”
“I see.”
“Do you think he hates me?” She bites her lower lip as she waits for my answer.
Looking at her teeth on her plump lip, her dark brown eyes that are watching me, and with the memory of her in the bikini still playing in my head, my mind is filling with dirty thoughts. I feel my dick start to throb in my jeans. Sure I just woke up and I could blame it on morning wood, but that would be a lie. That innocent look in her eyes, with the blossoming body of a woman, does something to me it shouldn’t. I’m a dirty bastard for even thinking about sliding into her tight pussy.
I shake my head with a laugh. What the fuck is wrong with me? “No, I’m sure he doesn’t hate you. Why don’t you go home and I’ll talk to him when he comes in and try to figure this thing out.”
Her eyes widen. “Really? You’d do that for me?”