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“Totally.” She arches her back, posing on her own. I snap more pictures, loving how relaxed and comfortable she’s become around me. “Was that your favorite princess movie?”
“No. It’s too traumatizing.”
I lower my camera. “How so?”
“The moment the Beast’s curse breaks and he turns human again has to be one of the greatest let downs in cinematic history.”
I burst out laughing. “He wasn’t that bad.”
“Then you can have him. I’m a Beast girl, now and forever.”
Be still my caged heart.
“I think we’re good with these. Want to do another wardrobe change?”
“Yes, please.”
To my surprise, she lifts the sweater over her head, revealing a tank top that says, “My favorite color is morally grey” with a set of fangs on it. Paired with black panties, this woman looks positively sinful. I need to reel in my focus and regain some professionalism here. I’ve never faltered like this before and it’s starting to unnerve me.
“So, how long have you been a photographer?”
“Since middle school.”
Her eyes widen with surprise. “Really?”
“Yeah. I’m not a people person, but FOMO’s a bitch. Holding a camera solved the issue. I was in the mix, but not. Happy I went out, but relieved that most people left me the fuck alone.”
Her silence causes me to look up from my camera. Did I say something wrong? Wouldn’t be the first time, or the millionth, but I’d like to know if I have.
“That’s…” Her mouth curves into a lopsided smile. “Really relatable, actually.”
“You into photography too?”
“Hell no, I don’t know the first thing about fancy cameras. But I’m socially awkward and hate crowds. Hence, the books.” She fans the pages of the paperback in her hand.
“Take one with you everywhere you go, huh?”
“I’d feel naked without one. I even have spares in my car, another in my purse, and an app on my phone for emergency purposes.”
“Does that mean you went to parties and sat in the corner to read by yourself?”
“You better believe it. I’m not into drinking, or anything that alters my mind, even temporarily. All my friends were huge partiers, and I came from a small town in the middle of nowhere, so if you weren’t drunk in a cornfield on a Friday night, you were high in someone’s barn pretending it was a rave.” She rolls her eyes. “I also didn’t want to feel left out, so I’d go, but never actually immersed in any of it. I’m better now, but not by much.”
I realize I’ve dropped my camera to my thigh and have stalked closer to her. Giving Mak my full attention comes naturally, and I’m not about to break whatever connection this is becoming. “At least you’re doing what you love.”
“True.” She tips her head, reminding me of a fox studying her newest meal. “What got you into boudoir photography?”
Swallowing, I grip my camera tighter and debate on how much to say. Part of me wants to say a lot of things that I don’t normally share, which throws me off my game a bit. Erring on the side of caution, I go with my usual explanation. And yet, because the universe hates me, the first thing that flies out of my mouth is not what I intended. “I was bullied a lot for being overweight as a kid.” I tap my gut. “No matter how much I work out, I’ll never get rid of this extra cushion. I’m a natural big boy.”
Mak’s hands fall into her lap as she continues staring at me.
I keep talking, like a dumbass, but skirt past the whole truth and tell her a secondary one instead. “Anyway, I know self-image can be important. I was dating this one girl back in college who had a lot of insecurities. I thought she was stunning, and she couldn’t see what I saw when she looked in the mirror. No amount of compliments I gave her worked. Nothing I did in the bedroom convinced her, either. So, I started taking her picture.”
My chest constricts. I need to shut up, but I don’t.
“My camera doesn’t judge or define a person. It celebrates them in a way most people don’t get to see often. It can capture their beauty when they least expect it. I took photos of her, which she was hesitant about at first, until she saw the results.” I’ll never forget that day. “The look on her face is burned in my mind forever. She saw what my camera captured, without a single bit of photoshopping or editing, and she fell in love with herself for the first time. That’s when I knew boudoir photography was going to be my thing. Every client that walks through my door will eventually have the same look on their face as my first girlfriend did.”
Mak’s eyes grow watery, and that makes me feel weird, so I quickly recover and get back to business. “Okay, enough bullshitting. Hook your thumb under your strap.” She immediately obeys me again. “Good girl. Now lift your other arm up and bring your hand up into your hair. Elbow in. Now soften your fingers in your hair.”