Page 48 of Save Us
“Great story, Xander, it worked perfectly!” he says, sounding ecstatic with the outcome that Angela has had to pay the price for. I begin to feel like I could throw up again. “Things are moving a little more quickly than I anticipated. I need you to print two more stories ASAP.”
“No way, Fox, I just heard his wife bore the brunt of that story,” I reply with determined fury in my voice, which I don’t even try to hold back from him. “I’m not going to risk her safety again.”
“These stories will be the last ones, I promise-”
“No, Fox!” I shout and we fall into a pregnant pause, with each of us carefully considering our next words.
“Xander,” he says slowly, like he’s edging toward a spooked animal that is getting ready to bolt, “if you don’t print these stories, I can’t help her. You need to report that Lawrence has run back to California to escape the heat. You also need to report on the Chad Marsdon funeral tomorrow, with a particular focus on my presence there.”
“Why the hell should I?”
His ordering me about is pissing me off, as well as getting innocent people, like Angela, into more trouble than she’s already in.
“Because I’m trying to save her, Fenton!” he shouts at me with the first bit of sincere emotion he’s ever shown. It works enough to spark my interest again.
“As well as helping yourself; isn’t that convenient!” I say accusingly.
“It doesn’t change the fact that if you help me, I can help her. If you don’t, I can’t, and she will be left with Lawrence for the foreseeable. We both know his attacks are getting more frequent and more serious. Besides,” he says with an air of amusement, “you want to save her too. You’ve grown to care about Angela Lawrence, haven’t you? Ever since your tete-a-tetes.”
“You bastard!” I snap. “That’s why you got me in contact with her!”
At the end of my tether, I angrily take a swipe at all the crap on my desk, even the laptop. It’s enough to send everything flying to the floor with such a crash, a few people look up from the office behind me.
“Report it and that will be all. I give you my word!” he says in such a way, I believe him. After a few long tense minutes, I reluctantly concede.
“Fine!” I mutter, then hang up before I have to listen to his asshole voice again.
I don’t recall falling asleep that night, but I must have because when I wake up it’s dark, and the curtains are still wide open. I stare out at the sky with the moon shining right inside of my room, almost blinding me with its luminosity as it casts a silvery light over the little girl who is curled up next to me. I look down at her sleeping body and kiss her cheek before smirking at my little master ninja of a daughter. She’s a mistress of stealth when it comes to sneaking inside of my bed after she’s had a bad dream. She’s always able to crawl in next to me without me even realizing it until I wake and she’s suddenly there beside me.
I stroke the hair back from her face, watching her in awe as she breathes lightly through her mouth with parted lips that remind me of how she used to sleep as a baby. In fact, I can easily picture her cute little chubby face from when she was only a few months old. It brings back painful memories of those early days without Beth, and it nearly breaks me.
Pulling myself together, I grab the sheet and pull it all the way up to her shoulders, tucking tuck her in before turning back to the window to try and get back to sleep. However, it’s then that I see her sitting in front of the window, gazing up at the moon, with her hair falling in gentle waves down her back. She’s wearing a long, white, cotton night dress; one that is very similar to the one which Rosie is wearing. She is sitting so still that she looks like a statue.
Her presence shocks me at first because I’ve never pictured Beth looking so peaceful outside of sex before. This is a first, but it also feels like the end of something. The strangeness of it doesn’t stop me from leaping up and going straight to her. In fact, it only makes me more desperate to reach her.
I walk slowly around her, just staring at her apparition while she continues to look up at the moon. She only acknowledges me when I finally have to courage to pick up her hand and bring it to my lips. She closes her eyes on my contact, then looks at me with a slight curling of her lips.
“Baby, what are you doing here?” I whisper, causing her smile to drop and for tears to take its place instead.
“What are you doing, Xander?” she asks sadly. “You are forgetting about me.”
“No, no, I could never forget you,” I tell her as I shake my head and lean in to cup her face. The lump in my throat becomes unbearable as she nuzzles against my hand. “I love you so much!”
“Then why are you risking what I died for?” she whispers with more tears in her eyes. “You’re inviting them into your life, into her life,” she says as she looks over to the sleeping girl inside of my bed.
“I need him to pay, Beth,” I say to her through angry tears, “it was his fault you died!”
“I died naturally, Xander,” she whimpers, “I died to give you both lives, and you’re risking it! You need to move on.”
“I can’t, Beth!” I just about manage to tell her as I descend into tears. Just as I break, I throw my arms around her and pull her against me.
“Rosie needs you, Xander, not revenge,” she sighs. “And one day she will need a new mother, and you will need someone to give your heart to. Not a woman who died five years ago.”
“No, no, no, my heart will always belong to you!” I plead as I continue to sob against her shoulder. “I don’t want anyone else. Please, stay, baby, please-”
“You’re too cute to end up like Stephen,” she giggles, and I frown for a moment, trying to recall where I’ve heard that line before. My mind is too cloudy to make sense of it, so I close my eyes to the hurt of it all.
“Beth…please, stay!”