Page 112 of Beautiful Chaos
“What do you mean?”
“Cat,” she says. “She’s ready for a baby. She wants one so badly, but she’s afraid to tell you.”
My gut drops and a heavy weight settles over my heart.
“Afraid, why?”
Presley puts my hand down on the bed, the tips of my fingers still touching her shin. Dropping her elbow to her knee, she plops her chin in her hand.
“She’s worried that you’ll think she’s not ready. She is though.” A small smile curls her lips. “She was always meant to be a mother longer than she was. And you were meant to be a father longer than you were.” She pauses for a moment. “Eliana and Ryder were so lucky to have parents like you and Cat. The children you still have yet to have will be even luckier, since you’ll know what a precious gift they are and how easily it can be taken away.”
My throat tightens, and I’m forced to clear it before it chokes me.
“Thank you,” I say gruffly.
There is no need for me to elaborate. Presley knows what my gratitude is for. If it wasn’t for her and the other two women, I’m not sure Cat would have survived the shit that was forced on her. Scarlett was the darkest part of her that felt like she deserved pain for what happened to our children. Athena was the loner. Rather, she felt as if she should be alone. Like no one could ever love her after what happened, and even if they did, she didn’t deserve it.
Both women took their places and carried the burden of those emotions so Cat wouldn’t have to.
But it was Presley who kept that spark of life inside Cat. She kept the light on while the others navigated through the darkness. Through Presley, the innocence, the love of a child, the need to be loved, she held Cat’s hand and guided her so she would never get lost.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever be back.” My brows drop at Presley’s softly spoken words. “But know that I’ll never be far away.”
Even though I want Cat to be whole again, I will miss Presley. Scarlett and Athena have only made a few appearances over the last year, which is a lot less than usual. Presley has shown herself more, but I don’t think it’s because Cat really needs her. I think Presley just likes to come out and play. To visit the world and see what we’re up to.
Her deep blue eyes gaze into mine. “I’m going to miss you.”
Rising to an elbow, I lean over and press a kiss against her forehead. “I’m gonna miss you too,” I say quietly.
When I pull back to look at her, her eyes are closed and she has that small smile on her face again.
Seconds later, when her eyes flutter open, Presley is gone and my beautiful wife is back.
* * *
Some more time later…
Standing with my shoulder propped against the doorway, my hands shoved in my pockets and my ankles crossed, I watch what’s going on across the room.
A single lamp on the nightstand between the two twin beds illuminates most of the room, leaving much of it in shadow.
“Tell us a story, Mommy,” Everly, our four-year-old daughter, requests with a hopeful look in her eyes.
“Yeah, Momma, please,” chimes in River, Everly’s twin brother, who’s lying beside his sister.
When the twins were old enough to leave their cribs and have bigger beds, we put them in separate rooms. However, they weren’t having it. Each night, one of them snuck into the other’s room and climbed into their bed. They didn’t like being separated. After six months of this, we moved them into the same room. They were okay sleeping in their own beds, so long as they were still close to each other. Even so, each night, they lay together while Cat or I tell them a story.
Cat laughs as she sits on the edge of Everly’s bed. Picking up the framed photo of Eliana and Ryder, she brings it to her lap and gazes down at it, her eyes full of love.
“There once was a little girl,” Cat begins. “A beautiful little girl with long brown hair that almost reached her waist. Her name was Eliana. She was sweet and kind and she loved her baby brother, Ryder, so much. The day her momma and daddy brought him home from the hospital, Eli sat for hours outside his bassinet and just watched him. Anytime Ryder moved or made the tiniest of sounds, Eli was right there, making sure he was okay.”
She smiles and looks from Everly to River, both of whom were captivated by their mother’s story.
“Eli used to tell her mother that she was going to have a baby just like her brother one day.”
A twinge of pain hits my chest as her smile slips a fraction, but it’s back a moment later.
“But sissy never got to have a baby, right?” Everly asks.