Page 20 of The Love Penalty

We’re going to Offside for a drink. Please come join us. I miss you!

Why does she keep doing this to me?

Can’t she understand that I need to hide away from places like that?

She won’t unless you tell her the truth.

My stomach pinches, a breath catching in my chest as I imagine trying to explain why I’ve been acting like this lately. What will she think? Say?

Ugh. Her reaction.

I can’t do it.

So, what do I do instead?

Ignore her?

Keep being a shitty friend?

She’s gonna hate me… or stop trying altogether. That fear drove me to Denver, and I did have a few good times there. The poker was fun and?—

“Shit,” I mutter, quickly typing back.

She responds within seconds.

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! See you there, wahine!

I swallow, staring at my laptop screen with a fleeting look of longing before closing it and getting ready to go out.

I almost consider changing but decide that my high-waisted flares and simple white T-shirt are fine. Shoving on my boots, I grab my leather jacket and flick my thick hair out, then force myself to put on a little lip gloss.

I’m usually into makeup and doing things to make my eyes pop, but ever since… well, I just don’t care as much anymore. I don’t want anything that will draw attention to me anyway.

Pausing by the mirror, I check my reflection and give myself a quick pep talk. “You’re doing this for your best friend who loves you. And you love her, and you don’t want to lose her, so you go, you smile, you laugh.” I swallow, gritting my teeth and speaking firmly. “You can do this, Lani. You can do it.” My voice cracks and I blink quickly, taking in a fortifying sniff before walking out the door.

I order an Uber, then wait outside the dorm building. Thankfully, it arrives in just a few minutes and I jump in, muttering a soft “Hi” before ignoring the driver. Nibbling my lip in the back seat, I manage to eat off most of my gloss before we pull up outside Offside.

“Thanks for the ride,” I murmur as I open the door.

“Have a good night.” The driver grins at me. I wonder if his smile would be so broad if he knew the chaos in my chest right now. If he could feel the maelstrom in my stomach.

You’re doing this for Caroline. She’s your best friend. Step the hell up, Lani!

My pep talk turns into more of a lecture as I fist my fingers and walk toward the bar.

The door swings open before I get to it, and I wait for the group to exit before I slip behind them. The music of the live band envelops me first.

They’re one of the local bands, and they’re pretty good. I’ve heard them play before. They’ve got a pop-rock style that’s easy to dance to, and their original stuff is just as good as the covers they play.

The place is vibing for a Monday night. Now that hockey and football seasons have come to an end, I guess people have more time to party? I don’t know.

All I know is that my teeth are on edge, and it’s taking everything in me not to spin for the door again.

“Lani!”

I hear my name and turn toward the sound.

Caroline’s bright curls catch my eye first. She’s grinning and waving, obviously happily surprised to see I actually made it.