Page 89 of The Love Penalty

LEILANI

The only sound in this room is my gentle sniffing as I try to deny myself even more tears. I can’t cry again. My eyes are so swollen and sore. I’ve been dabbing them with tissues, but they’re puffy and so tender that even the gentlest pressure hurts.

I sobbed on that bathroom floor.

Threw up more bile until my stomach and throat were aching.

Casey left at some point. I don’t know where he went, and all I can hope is that it wasn’t anywhere near Asher. I told him not to say anything, but will he ignore me and just do it anyway? Surely he’s not that cruel. This will kill Asher. He can never know.

Caroline’s stuck with me most of the afternoon. She helped me off the floor and made me take a shower. I cried under the hot spray, plunking down on my bare ass and weeping on the tiles. She ended up having to dry and dress me. Honestly, I just couldn’t function. I couldn’t make my brain work properly…

Until Asher’s text came through.

Hey, boo. Is it all right if I come over?

I couldn’t let that happen.

So I did it. I broke up with him the way I knew I had to. And it’s the most painful thing I’ve ever done. Telling the guy you love that you don’t want to be with him anymore is a torture I wouldn’t wish on anybody.

Because it was lie.

I do want him.

I want him so badly my soul is flailing in my chest. My body aches and burns… and there’s nothing I can do to ease this pain.

I’d give anything to have him walk through my door right now and hold me, kiss my tears away, and spoon me through the night.

But that’s a romantic fantasy that will never happen.

Because his cousin raped me.

And I can’t ever be in the same room with that man again. Which means I can never be with Asher because he and Harvey are blood. They’re practically brothers.

Family first.

That’s the way it’s got to be.

A shudder runs through me again as I battle another sob. It quakes my belly, and I whimper into my balled-up tissue.

This pain is immense. It’s a soul ache that burns my entire body. I don’t know how to handle it. And I hate myself for falling apart like this, but?—

There’s a knock on my door.

I flinch and turn to gape at the wood, because it’s not a polite knock, it’s a hard pound that’s turning into a series of urgent whacks. The door handle jiggles, and I lean closer to the wall, starting to freak out that someone’s trying to break into my room.

What the hell has become of me?

The old Lani would have told this person to fuck off and stop being so rude.

But this Lani—this wretched, weeping wreck—can’t even find her voice.

“Lani, are you there? Open up, it’s me.”

Casey?

With a confused frown, I jump off the bed. I’ve never heard him sound so worried before.

I pull the door back and take in his expression. Yep, he’s definitely worried.