Page 94 of The Love Penalty
I can see it in his eyes.
Caroline and Casey have gone painfully quiet, though I can sense them in the room still, watching us with heartbroken frowns. They get it. Everyone in this room is hurting.
Because they all know I’m right.
Leaning forward, I take Asher’s face and lightly kiss him. His lips are soft and beautiful, pressing against mine as both comfort and loss swirl through me.
I pull away while I still have the willpower to hold strong on my resolve.
Rubbing my thumb along his cheek, I try to smile and silently let him know how much he means to me.
“Thank you,” I whisper. “Thank you for everything you gave me. I’m really gonna miss you.”
CHAPTER 43
ASHER
I don’t know how I left Lani’s room on Monday night. I don’t actually remember it. I think Casey took me away, held my arm as we shuffled out of Huxley Hall together.
My brain has been in a fog ever since.
The week somehow passed me by, and now I’m standing in Uncle Hayes and Aunt Carla’s house wearing a suit and tie while I mingle with the rest of my extended family. My parents have flown in from New York, and my twin brothers are loitering near the fireplace, talking in hushed tones and looking bored out of their minds. I should go talk to them. We haven’t spoken in months, but I can’t make myself move away from the window.
I don’t want to be here.
I miss Lani.
She’s gone cold turkey and cut me off. I guess it’s easier for both of us that way.
Doesn’t make it less painful necessarily, but apparently time’s a healer, whatever the fuck that means.
The guys at Hockey House have been giving me a wide berth, probably because every time they talk to me, I growl at them like an angry bear. Shit, I must be so fucking painful to live with right now. They’re probably all relieved I had to leave the house for the day to come down to this… what are we even celebrating?
Ugh, like I give a shit.
Sipping my whiskey, I stand on the edge of the room, listening to my mother go on about how amazing my brothers are. “They’re really taking the business in a wonderful direction. Austin’s given them two new projects to work on, and they’re both booming.” Her laughter is loud, proud, and fucking irritating.
I glance across the room, glaring at the perfect twins with their smug smiles and bored expressions. They’ve spent their life soaking in Mom’s praise to the point where they don’t even appreciate it anymore.
“And did you hear Austin’s lined up an internship for Asher this summer?” She spins to beam at me. “Like the twins, he’ll need to earn his stripes. He’s got some big learning to do before he can work for Bensens & Co.”
“I think it’s so great you encourage that, Annabeth.” Aunt Carla gives her a tight smile. She’s waxing eloquent, but I know for a fact that Carla thinks my mom’s a plastic Barbie doll. And she hates the way my parents continue to pressure me and control my life.
She’s always let her children express themselves and pursue their dreams.
No wonder I like her better.
No wonder I wanted to be a Carmichael and not a Bensen.
No wonder Lani didn’t want to come between us all.
Fuck! I hate this.
I get why she made that decision. If Harvey looks like the guy who hurt her, then I shouldn’t expect her to be around him. It’s too complicated, right?
Logically, I need to let her go and move on.
But I can’t.