Page 43 of Fight

Ten

P

A few hours later, I stood in the shower, letting the almost scalding water beat down on my body.

I still felt the aftereffects of earlier with Ioan, both good and bad. I could easily remember how wonderful he had felt against my hands, how cherished I’d felt with each touch.

But he’d also left me needy, hungry for him, and I had little hope he would come back to me and take that hunger away.

I wanted that very badly, wanted it to a degree that left me breathless. How was it possible given all that hung over my head? I didn’t know, and honestly, couldn’t bring myself to care.

My body hummed with my desire for him, and almost on its own, my hand drifted down my stomach to rest at the apex of my thighs. I wanted to delve my fingers between them, touch myself as I imagined he would, but I held off, the sweet torture of anticipation a reward in its own right.

As I let my hand linger, I thought of what he would do, how he’d touch me with no hesitation or demand.

A rough moan came from my throat, and I pushed my hand lower, my clit throbbing with need. And when I finally touched that throbbing bundle, I imagined it was Ioan’s large hand, rough fingertips driving me to climax…

A sharp knock at the door brought me out of my fantasy.

I jumped and then turned off the water and quickly dried and dressed. It had gotten cold anyway. I left the bathroom and went to the bedroom door.

I still hadn’t locked it, but Ioan hadn’t barged in. My heart warmed and softened, the glow filling me from the inside out.

When I opened the door, he stood on the other side. He didn’t quite meet my eyes, and I felt a stab of disappointment. I didn’t want things to be awkward between us, but I guessed that wasn’t a possibility.

“I have to work. I’ll be back in the morning,” he said.

“I… Okay,” I finally said, swallowing back the mild panic that began to gather. I’d be here without him, and that scared me. A grown woman afraid of being alone. How pathetic.

Ioan’s life didn’t stop because I was here, and I couldn’t let myself forget that. And I sure as hell wouldn’t admit that I doubted I’d be able to sleep a wink if he was gone.

“Good night,” he said.

“Night,” I replied, trying to be nonchalant when I felt anything but.

I closed the door, not wanting to watch him walk away.

As I lay down in the soft bed that I refused to let myself get used to, I realized that Ioan had saved me from certain death, but now I needed someone to save me from my burning desire for him.

P

I woke the next morning feeling rested, the complete silence and total calm of Ioan’s house only adding to that sense.

Good job, P! You were conscious ten whole seconds before you thought about him.

I chuckled, happy enough to have a laugh at my own expense.

There was truth in it. I’d been nervous when he left, so nervous I hadn’t thought I’d rest. I had rested, and pretty easily. And Ioan had been my final thought before I’d slept, and he was the first when I woke.

I was dangerously close to gone for the man, and I needed to hold the line as much as I could. Which, at this moment, seemed impossible. I wanted him, but I was also confused. He hadn’t yet named a price for his help and didn’t seem especially eager to. More, his heated kisses and cryptic words had me off balance. The only unquestionably true thing I had to go on was how he made me feel, and if I went with that, I’d be gone for him forever.

That thought wasn’t one I could resolve, so I got up and headed to the shower, still deliriously thrilled when the steaming-hot water poured from the showerhead. I stayed there for a decadent twenty-five minutes before I finally pulled myself out.

By the time I’d cut the tags off my new clothes and dressed, I heard movement from the kitchen.

Ioan!

My heart lifted but just as soon crashed as I recalled how stilted things had been between us at the end last night, uncertain of how he would respond. Nervousness buzzed in my stomach as I left the room, but even those nerves were laced with excitement at seeing him.