Page 82 of The Packaged Deal
“Because I’m falling for you, too.”
And for some reason, her words make me feel like I’m flying.
twenty-two
Sven
There’s a cold kernel of displeasure that’s making this harder than it needs to be. Kandi says I need to let my walls down, but she’s wrong. I need to erect them and fortify them. I can’t let them see who I really am.
I pad through the house, silently searching until I find him sitting alone in his office.
Just having him in my sights, I find the disquiet inside me easing. He’s the most beautiful man I've ever seen. He’s also the smartest. I know him so well, I can tell there is something deeply wrong with him, and right now, Adrian is sitting in a storm of his own making. His jacket is gone, and his shirt is hanging open.
“Are we going to talk about it? What’s wrong with us? I’ve tried to put my finger on what went wrong, and all I can come up with is that sex with me was awful for you.”
Addy looks up, his blue eyes find me and shutter, which pisses me off. Why is Addy keeping secrets from me?
I ease into the room and stalk towards him, where he’s sitting on his office chair, and grip his nape. He shoves my hand off and stands up. I don’t give him even a second to move away from me. I’m in his space, pushing him up against the wall, but unlike with Kandi, Addy spins and shoves me back.
I capture his wrist and jerk him towards me. He grips my throat with one huge hand and puts pressure on it. I still, my chin tilted up.
Addy growls. It’s such a raw, wild sound. “Hypothetical question.” He pauses and squeezes my throat slightly. “Are you listening?”
“I’m listening,” I say in a low tone.
“If someone did something irrevocable and couldn’t remember it, would you tell them?”
“How irrevocable?”
“Life changing,” Addy whispers. “Something that will be with them forever.”
I search his eyes. Yeah, this pensive side of Addy is deeply concerning. “Whatever it is, it will be okay.”
“It’s self-preservation,” Addy murmurs, almost like we’re having a debate. “Trauma related. Something. Ethically, this could be the worst thing I’ve ever done in my life. But…”
“What?”
“You gave me no fucking choice,” Addy growls. “How can I possibly live like this? After what happened to her, how can I allow it to go on?”
I don’t know what’s going on, but he still has hold of my neck, and the atmosphere feels charged, dangerous.
“Adrian,” I whisper. “What’s wrong? I’ll fix it. Whatever it is, just tell me, and I’ll take care of it.”
He focuses on me, and it’s like he’s seen me for the first time since I walked into the room. His eyes darken, and his fingers flex. “I should tell you. I really fucking should. Perhaps it would be better to show you?”
“Tell me what?” But even as I say the words, a shiver ripples up my spine, and I get this thought that whispers, I don’t want to know.
“Tell you,” Adrian leans in close, his lips brushing over mine, but the kiss lacks kindness. It’s cruel in its gentleness, and my hackles rise. “Perhaps I should just return the kindness. No questions, no conversations. I should just…take. What’s. Mine.”
Adrian reaches for his belt, undoing it with one hand and snapping it out of his pants. Despite the warning inside me, I lean towards him, needing to get closer.
I reach out and push his shirt back, sliding my hands up his hot skin. Addy doesn’t even acknowledge me.
“Kneel,” he growls coldly.
For a moment, I hesitate, but I allow him to push me down to my knees by my throat.
“Look closely, Sven. Really close.”