Page 13 of My Shy Alpha
But Noah doesn’t seem to want to continue kissing, drawing me to his chest much gentler this time.
“You still seem nervous,” he says.
It’s true. I haven’t been this intimate with a stranger. With how much my college peers acted like hookups were the expected norm at 19, I feel like I seem immature to never have experienced a hookup at 29. Really, I’m scared of being hurt again if I sleep with someone on day one.
But should I be even more vulnerable with Noah and tell him that?
“I’m sorry, I’m just a bit cautious.” My stomach churns, but the concern in Noah’s eyes makes me whisper the truth. “About being hurt again. And it’s nothing about you, it’s just– When you see a pattern in life, it’s dangerous not to pay attention. At least, that’s what I’ve learned. A-and I didn’t know if we’d...”
I glance toward my bedroom, swallowing hard.
Noah’s breath is just as short as mine, his sharp eyes zipping back to me after catching on the bra I left on the hallway floor. “Don’t apologize. You’re my mate. I don’t want to do anything you’re not interested in.”
My heart twinges. “I am interested, I’m just anxious.”
Noah is silent for a moment. “I’m anxious too.”
I feel like he wants to tell me more.
I guide him to my couch by the hand. Three steps in, I trip over my scrapbooking mess from the night before, ready to meet my doom as the coffee table’s glass top inches closer by the millisecond. But Noah tucks me to his side like it’s the easiest thing he’s done all night, righting me on my feet with one arm. I flush, but then I see his shy, flustered glance and my embarrassment washes away.
He’s so damn cute. I’m dying to reassure him.
“Is there something we’re doing that’s making you anxious?”
Already sitting, Noah gazes up at me as I say those words. It has a heavy effect on him, his face reddening by the second.
A smile peeks from his stoic lips. “I want to tell you more, but please, feel free to sit with me.”
He’s right. I’m hesitating, unsure how close he’ll want me to sit beside him and awkwardly hovering my butt over the cushions. I’m relieved to see his amused smile and break into giggles.
When his arm wraps around me from behind, tucking me into his side, I burst into laughter, huddling closer. Noah squeezes me tight, and I welcome his embrace as I lay against his chest.
His poor heart is still pounding. At least I’m not alone.
Noah clears his throat. “It’s just... Wolves are all instinct, but I know humans need longer to feel comfortable with bonding for life. And I want to respect your boundaries. You were raised as a human, right?”
The way he phrased that is weird...
Peeking at my furrowed expression, Noah softens. “That’s part of what I wanted to tell you. Wolves don’t always like humans - too many hunters. My initial reaction wasn’t about rejecting you. I was afraid that my pack - everyone I care about - wouldn’t accept my mate. I hate that I’ll be putting you through that, just by my position, and–” Noah’s jaw twitches. “Well, it’ll probably be a fight. If you’d eventually like to be with me, I’ll welcome you into my life, no matter what they think.”
My heart scrambles until I’m dizzy. But I haven’t felt this elated in years. Whatever expression I’m making, Noah smiles the sweetest smile.
“D-do you have any questions, sweet Omega?”
“Yes. But my name’s Aliya, not Omega.”
Noah’s head drops to his lap, burying his face in his palm before I can see his full smile. “Sorry... A-Aliya.”
My whispered name makes me suck in a deep breath. Noah pauses, having to catch his own.
When I don’t say anything, he speaks even softer. “I-I just registered you as my Omega the second we met, but I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have called you that without even asking your name - what a fail.” He groans, and I can’t help but giggle. Soon enough, we’re laughing together. “I-it’s just, you smell really sweet. Like the sweetest Omega alive, but you’re also sweet, as in kindhearted, so I just thought...”
That’s how he perceives me? I don’t know what an Omega means to him since I only know some people used to claim it’s the lowest wolf pack rank, but the way Noah says it makes me feel like it means something beautiful. If wolf hearing is a thing, Noah can hear my hammering heart.
But when he doesn’t come back out from his makeshift hiding place, I lift the edge of his palm with my pointer finger. “You really are a shy wolf. My... what did you call yourself? My Alpha?”
Noah slams his palm shut again, curling lower with a groan. “Fuck, you’re so cute. I don’t know what to do.”