Page 61 of Broken Desires
Eva just nods, thoughtful. “Insane? A bit, yeah. But then, a lot of amazing things seem insane at first. I mean, everyone thought I was nuts for giving Cole a second chance, let alone marrying him. But here I am, happier than ever.”
Her words give me a bit of hope, something to cling to in the whirlwind of my thoughts.
Poppy chimes in, trying to be helpful. “Sometimes, the crazy choices are the right ones.”
“Even outside of a Hallmark movie?” I somewhat joke.
She shrugs. “Maybe. But I know this much, if you don’t try, you’ll always wonder, what if? I felt the same about Ethan, and giving us a chance was the best decision I ever made, even though I had a lot at stake.”
“So you think I should stay?” I ask, looking for some sort of confirmation.
Eva cuts in before Poppy can respond. “No, we’re saying you should listen to your gut. And deep down, you probably already know what you want. You’re just trying to figure out if it’s too crazy.”
“Is it too crazy?” My voice is almost a whisper, half hoping they will say it is, half hoping they won’t.
Both Poppy and Eva nod, their agreement coming in a quiet chorus. “It is crazy,” Eva says with a level of sincerity that makes me listen. “But sometimes, crazy leads to the best parts of our lives. The real question is, do you love him?”
I pause, the weight of the question anchoring me. “I love Liam,” I start, feeling the distinction between him and Alexander keenly. “He’s everything I’ve ever wanted—kind, thoughtful, and he just gets me. But then there’s Alexander, with his duties and a life I know nothing about. What if that’s too much?”
Their silence speaks volumes, reflecting the gravity of my dilemma back at me.
Eva breaks the quiet, her words firm. “He loves you, Nessa. That much is clear to anyone who sees you two together. Cole’s seen it, we’ve seen it. You need to have a conversation with him. Share your fears. He’ll listen.”
The idea of laying all my worries bare is daunting, but Eva’s right. “I do want to stay,” I confess, the truth of it ringing clear. “I want to be with him.”
“Then talk to him,” Poppy urges, her conviction bolstering my resolve. “He’s been honest with you about everything else when asked directly. Let him reassure you.”
Their advice settles deep within me, bringing some clarity to the storm of my emotions. Wanting to stay isn’t just about embracing the love I have for Liam; it’s about confronting the unknowns of Alexander’s world head-on. The first step is having that all-important conversation, armed with the knowledge that, at its core, this decision is about love—the kind that’s willing to navigate through the crazy to find its footing.
“Okay, I’ll go see him now,” I declare, feeling a mix of determination and nerves.
“Text us later!” Eva asks before I head for the door.
“Promise!” I reply, my mind already racing ahead to the conversation I’m about to have with Alexander.
Just as I’m about to message him, I’m surprised to find his adviser, Hank, waiting outside my room.
“Can I help you?” I ask, slightly on guard.
“Oh, Miss Caldwell. Yes, I was hoping to speak with you briefly, if you don’t mind,” Hank says, maintaining a professional demeanor.
I touch my chest in a questioning gesture, and he nods. “I was actually looking for Alexander. Do you know where I can find him?”
Hank’s expression tightens slightly, a hint of disapproval seeping through. “His Majesty is in the library.”
I mentally kick myself for not using Alexander’s title; even his name is a protocol minefield.
Hank gestures for me to follow. “Please, allow me to escort you there.”
With a nod, I agree, though I’m bracing myself for whatever this conversation might entail.
“Before we go, as you might be aware, my name is Hank, and I served as the late king’s secretary for twenty-five years before assuming my current role beside King Alexander,” he shares.
“Yes, that is impressive and I’m sure that King Alexander is grateful to have you.”
“Thank you, Miss Caldwell. I appreciate your kind words. It’s been a significant transition for all of us,” Hank says as we start walking toward the library. His face appears formal, but I sense a thaw in his initial standoffishness.
As we navigate the corridors, I brace myself for what’s coming. Hank’s presence, by my door no less, suggests this isn’t a casual chat. He stops us for a moment and continues talking to me.