Page 18 of The Unseelie Wish

She wasn’t expecting the rant. Maybe she was bottling it all up and just needed to talk to someone. “So here I am, on a seven-day stay of execution, spinning my wheels. I didn’t know what else to do. But I had to do something to keep from going right back to Izael. He’s going to do anything in his power to make sure Valroy gets what he wants so that snake can steal my soul! My feelings don’t play into this at all!” Letting out a defeated sigh, she shut her eyes. “Sorry.”

“No reason to apologize. You have earned the outburst.” Bayodan placed his hand on her shoulder. “I do not envy your predicament. I repeat my advice, however, regarding discerning the true nature of your emotions toward the duke.”

“It. Doesn’t. Matter.” It was hard not to get frustrated with him. He wasn’t who she was mad at. Honestly, she didn’t even know who she was mad at. Valroy? Izael? Herself?

Yes?

She was going with yes.

“If your sentiment does not weigh in on your path forward—perhaps you are correct and it does not—and you have little else to be doing during this week by your own admission, then what harm will it do to consider the topic?” Bayodan rubbed her back. She hated that it was actually comforting.

“Okay, Dad.” She put her head in her hands.

“If you believe that I will bristle at the comment, you do not understand how many times I have been gifted a similar honorific in moments of passion.”

It took a second for it to click in her head. She let out a groan of despair which earned her a laugh from the Unseelie. “I really didn’t need to hear that.”

“I know.”

Keeping her head in her hands, she thought over his words. There were a few reasons she was admittedly avoiding trying to answer the question of how she felt about Izael. “In the same breath he says he loves me and also wants to torture me within an inch of my life.”

“We are Unseelie.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“No, but perhaps it is a reason.”

She rubbed her temples. This was going to give her a headache.

“Do you love him in return?” Bayodan put his hand back in his lap.

“Honestly?” Whatever. What was the harm in telling the truth? “I don’t know.” Maybe I do, but I know I shouldn’t. Maybe I do, but I can’t let myself because of what it’ll mean. “It’s a mess.”

“I believe you just summarized a great deal of relationships in three words.” Bayodan sighed. His deep voice made it sound like a mountain was sighing. “Mine was no different when it began.”

“Oh?”

“I was betrothed to another. A duchess, in fact, when I met Cruinn. They are of low station—and at the time had been a servant in another home. But to defend against the desires of the heart is an attempt to pull the moon from the sky.”

“You had a social faux pas and an ugly breakup. You weren’t potentially responsible for the death of two worlds.” Alex rubbed her temple.

“I had to murder her and her entire bloodline.”

She blinked and looked over at the Unseelie. “Well, shit.”

“As you put it so elegantly earlier, I believe the phrase is ‘fucking fae.’” He smiled wryly.

Huffing a laugh, she watched the ducks on the pond in the center of the garden. Part of her was a little jealous. They only had to worry about duck stuff. None of this nonsense. “I really don’t know how I feel about him.”

“Then take this time to discover the truth. It may matter more than you think. I have found, through my centuries, there is very little in this world that can influence seemingly unstoppable forces, quite like love.” Bayodan looked tired for a moment. “The Morrigan knows we fae are not immune to its influence.”

“You’re referencing Valroy and Abigail?”

“Indeed.” He shook his head. “What an ugly affair it was between those two when it began. I must say, I very much appreciate the level-headedness you possess. I do not think I could handle another panicking mortal witch in this millennium.”

She snickered. “I’m not much of the panicking type. Although watching Izael—I don’t know—unzip—was pretty gnarly.” She grimaced. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

He chuckled. “Moments of horror are expected and quite allowed. I would say that Izael is the worst of us, but that would be a lie. He is, however, rather spectacular in that regard.”