Page 116 of Love Unwritten

Shit. I didn’t even think of that, but it could explain some things. “Give me a minute.”

I call the concierge desk and request to speak with the hotel’s travel agent. Nico rifles through the bags of supplies we bought, waiting patiently for me to finish up.

While I’m busy on the phone, he accidentally sprays blue shaving cream all over my comforter.

“Oops! Sorry!” He rushes into the bathroom before coming back with a towel. “I got it!” He means well, but the mess only gets worse as he proceeds to spread it everywhere. I’m not sure how he even managed to get it in his hair, but a few strands are stuck together from the residue.

Thankfully, I hang up the phone a few minutes later and can finally give him my full attention.

“Let’s get you cleaned up.” I lead him into the large en suite and place the bag of supplies on the counter. Nico pulls out his kid’s shaving kit and passes it to me.

“Can you open it?”

I spare him a look.

“Please.”

I help open the package enough for him to get the plastic shaver and shaving cream out for himself.

“This is fun.” He giggles as he covers the bottom half of his face. “Ho. Ho. Ho.”

I swallow my laugh as I run my new shaver under some hot water after splashing my face with it.

“Is it going to hurt?” He checks out the blades.

“No, as long as I don’t cut myself.”

“Does that happen?”

“Sometimes. I’m a bit out of practice.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t then.”

My chest clenches at the hint of fear in his voice.

“I’ll be fine.” I kiss the top of his head before I follow his lead and cover my beard with shaving cream. Nico quickly moves on from worrying about me, instead choosing to make squiggly lines across his face with the plastic razor.

“This is awesome!” He laughs.

I press my lips together to stop myself from smiling. With a steady hand, I run the razor from the middle of my neck upward. The swift stroke reveals skin that has been hidden for two years.

Two long, agonizing years.

I didn’t think a simple task like shaving could have such a visceral effect on me, but my next breaths prove otherwise.

It’s time for a change. I repeat the same motion, revealing another clear patch of skin.

You’re doing this for you. Me. Not Nico, although I’m happy he will no longer associate my lack of upkeep with my sadness, and I’m most definitely not doing this for my family, who will be happy to see my whole face again regardless.

Every swipe of the blade leads me closer to letting go of the old me. The broken me. The me that spent the last two years in a haze, hardly living at all.

I couldn’t be happier about the change. I want to look better because I care. Because I want to look past the person I was and accept the man that I can be.

Correction: the man I want to be.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

Ellie