Page 123 of Love Unwritten
“I got a vasectomy when I found out about Nico’s condition.”
My heart squeezes.
He doesn’t look away as he speaks. “I love him, but I didn’t want to risk having another kid who could struggle with RP one day. Didn’t want to pass that burden on out of selfishness, so I took care of the problem.”
“That’s okay.”
“Is it?”
“Of course. You of all people know adoption is always an option.”
His eyes narrow, and I can immediately tell he doesn’t believe me.
Can tell he doesn’t want to either.
“So you don’t want kids of your own?” he asks.
“I mean, I’ve thought about it, but who hasn’t?”
The muscles around his eyes soften. “I thought so.”
His resigned tone fuels my frustration. “Why are you asking me all these questions in the first place? What point are you trying to prove here?”
“That touching you…” He cradles my cheeks between his palms. “Wanting you… It may feel right, but we couldn’t be more wrong for each other.”
I don’t realize how much his words hurt until they affect my breathing.
His sad smile is meant to soften what comes next, but it has the opposite effect, making the dread building inside my stomach worse. “I don’t want to get married again and have more kids. I’ve been there, done that, and barely made it out alive the first time. Hell, I’m still paying the price every single day and probably will be for the next nine plus years, all because I had a kid with someone who doesn’t deserve him.” His voice cracks toward the end.
“Rafael,” I say in a broken whisper.
He brushes my cheek soothingly, which makes the ache in my chest feel unbearable. “One day, when you find the one you’ve been looking for, he better do everything in his power to keep you because you deserve the kind of love that they write songs about.” A single tear slips out of the corner of my eye, and he brushes it away with the pad of his thumb.
He pulls back, but not before he steals the flower he gave me straight from my hair.
My heart splinters right down the middle, a thousand cracks forming as he walks back to the Jeep, taking whatever misguided hope I had about the two of us with him.
The next morning, I wake up to Nico bouncing on my bed, shouting for me to get up before the yacht takes off without me. I have no idea what he is talking about until I check my phone and read a cryptic message from Rafael.
RAFAEL
Slight change to our travel plans. We will be taking a boat from Oahu to Kauai instead of a plane.
With that confirmation, I pack both Nico’s and my suitcases, all while he keeps talking about this massive yacht and all the activities we get to do over the next day.
Only Rafael would pay a seven-day retainer fee for a yacht he plans on using for twenty-four hours. I should find it obnoxious, but then again, if he wants to spend millions to help his kid have the trip of a lifetime, I can’t fault him for trying.
I’m not sure what brought on the drastic change to our plans, but I’m not about to complain about spending the day on a yacht, although it does make me a little queasy when I think about Rafael’s bank statement and the fishing boat from the other day.
An hour later, the hired car drops us off at a private marina. Nico is already a hundred feet in front of us because he wants to analyze every single boat before we find ours.
“Did you take your Dramamine?” Rafael asks while rolling our luggage.
“No?” With this morning’s craziness, I completely forgot about it.
Rafael reaches inside his carry-on duffel bag and pulls out a tube. “Here.”
“You have some too?”