Page 142 of Love Unwritten
I wasn’t solid, but I won’t make that mistake again.
I’m going to figure out who I am and what I want in life, so the next time Ellie gives me a chance—and she will—I won’t throw it away.
I’ll make sure of it.
CHAPTER FORTY
Ellie
Rafael and I officially enter a new—and slightly strained—phase of our relationship once the yacht docks in Kauai the following morning. We may have agreed to be friends, but there is no denying the undercurrent of sexual tension that passes between us whenever we lock eyes or accidentally touch each other.
Thankfully, Nico provides the best distraction, and we spent our first day on the island zip-lining and hiking. The hike we went on made Nico tear up, which then made my own eyes water because watching him come to terms with his worsening eyesight breaks my heart.
Do you think I’ll remember what it looks like? he asked me with a sniffle.
If you don’t, you can always come back and see it, I replied.
What if it doesn’t look the same? he followed up.
The best part about sunsets is that you’ll never see the same one twice. Rafael wrapped his arm around Nico’s shoulder, and the three of us stuck around the cliff until the sun disappeared, leaving behind a pinkish hue that guided us back to our rental car.
Today, Nico wanted to jet-ski, so he and Rafael went while I hung out by the beach, frustrated at myself for not joining them.
As if he sensed my interest, Rafael asked me point-blank if I would like to go with them, but I came up with an excuse about wanting to work on my song.
Truth is, I can’t prance around in a swimsuit. The night Rafael joined me in the hot tub was a close call, and without bubbles and foam to hide my body, I’d risk revealing my darkest secret and stirring up a hundred different questions I’m not ready to answer.
Sticking to the beach is my best bet, even if it feels like a losing one.
After they return from jet-skiing, Rafael and Nico spend the rest of the day in the water, playing games while I stay out on a shaded lounge chair and work on the song I’m writing for Cole. My fingers hurt from how long I’ve been playing the guitar, but I’m so close to finishing.
Or at least I was until I got distracted by Rafael. My inattention isn’t because he is shirtless, although that sure doesn’t help matters.
No. I’m completely, unabashedly interested in Rafael, the father. The caring, enthusiastic, patient, and doting parent who hasn’t taken a single break since Nico asked him to go swimming over an hour ago.
I can’t hear them from my spot on the beach, but I wish I could, based on the way Nico throws his head back from time to time at something his father says.
Rafael may not want more kids, but he was born to be a dad. That much I know.
Nico shrieks as Rafael tosses him into the air for what has to be the fiftieth time, only to be cut off when he lands in the water with a splash. Rafael’s arms must be burning from the workout, but he hasn’t stopped yet.
Until now.
Nico follows him, chanting, “Again!”
“Give me a few minutes.”
Once I apply another layer of sunscreen to Nico’s skin, he grabs his binoculars and heads back to the beach while Rafael falls onto the empty lounge chair behind me. After spending all that time in the water with Nico, throwing him around and acting like a dolphin for him to ride, I would need more than a few minutes, but then again, Rafael is a machine.
Rafael looks over at me and squints. “What’s got you smiling like that?”
“You,” I answer honestly.
“What did I do?”
My smile only brightens. “You’re a really amazing dad.”
His already sunburnt cheeks darken. “You think so?”