Page 9 of The Eraser

I nod. "That's okay," I tell her, knowing she worries when she leaves me home alone with Dad. Mam only knows about one time he hit me. When she saw the bruise on my arm, she lost the plot. I'd never heard her scream or shout at anyone the way she did my dad that day. Of course, that only infuriated him even more. Now, he's clever about where he leaves the marks on my body. He doesn’t hurt me often, just sometimes, and he's clever about the way he does it. He'll make it out to be my fault, as though I've done something wrong, when in actual fact, he's just angry about something and I'm the person he'll take it out on.

"You'll be in your room, sweetie. Everything will be fine."

Since that day, she's been careful about leaving me with him. Little does she know it's when we're all in the same house that it happens. Dad doesn't care when or where, he'll hurt me. He'll get his anger out the best way he knows how and then everything will be back to normal after that.

"It will," I assure her. "Don't worry about me, Mam. I'll be fine." I'll lock my door the moment she leaves. Knowing Dad, he'll be busy anyway so he'll not bother me at all.

"Okay," she says, giving me a relieved smile. "I won't be long," she assures me. "Please make sure you drink," she tells me. "I have water in the fridge. Would you like one?"

I nod as I take another bite, grateful my stomach isn't rolling any longer. I'm famished and need to eat, but it's so damn dry that it feels like cardboard going down. Water is very much needed.

It takes me a few minutes to finish the slice of toast and have some drink. By the time I'm finished, I'm feeling extremely sick again. Damn it.

"Have fun shopping, Mam," I tell her as I get to my feet. "I'm going to lie down."

She gives me a soft but worried look. "Do, sweetie. I won’t be long," she promises me. "I'll just grab the essentials and then I'll be home."

"Don't worry," I tell her. "I'll be sleeping anyway. Get whatever you need."

She shuffles over to me and presses a kiss to my cheek. "Sleep, sweetie. I love you."

I beam at her. "I love you too," I say as I lean into her. "I'll see you later."

I make my way upstairs, and the moment I'm in my room, I engage the lock and climb into bed. God, my stomach is cramping again. This was how it was last night before I threw up. Maybe having toast wasn't the best idea in the world.

I lie in the fetal position and close my eyes, praying the pain will pass quickly. While I’m happy that I don’t have to go to school today, I’m sad that I’m missing my dance class.

I’ve been dancing since I could walk, according to Mam. I’ve been at Miss Lara’s dance studio since I was four, and I love it. The older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve turned to ballet as my preferred dance. Not that I don’t love all types; I just find ballet feeds my soul. I’m able to let go and just be.

A smile plays on my face as I think about the last recital I did and how much Mam loved watching it. I release a soft sigh as I sink deeper into the mattress, the pain in my stomach starting to ease somewhat.

It doesn’t take long until I’m drifting off to sleep.

* * *

"Jessie," I hear someone yelling as my bedroom door handle rattles. "Jessie, you in there?"

I sit up, blinking as I wake from the deep sleep. What on earth is that noise? The door handle rattles again, and I blink again, trying to rid the sleepy fog from my mind.

"Jessica?"

My brows knit together as I clutch the sheets in my hand. Why is uncle Jer here?

"Yeah?" I call out sleepily, my body shaking. Something has happened. I can feel it, sense it. Jer wouldn’t be here if it hadn’t. "What's going on?"

"Loveen, I need you to open the door. Can you do that for me?" he says, and I can hear the anger and worry in his tone of voice.

I shuffle out of bed, my body weak and tired. It takes me a while to move toward the door, but the moment I open it, Jer's pushing through and pulling me into his arms. "Jessie," he says, his body shaking as he holds me tight.

"Jer, what's going on?" I ask, my body tight as he holds me. What's happened?

"I'm sorry, loveen. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but it's your mam," he rumbles. The heartache in his voice has my heart racing.

Goosebumps break out throughout my body at his words. I swallow hard and release a shuddering breath. "What do you mean my mam? Where is she?"

He shakes his head. "I'm sorry, Jessica, but something happened. She didn't make it."

"No," I say through a lump in my throat. It’s as though the walls are crumbling down around me. My ears are fuzzy, like I’m going through a tunnel. I glance up at Jerry, the man who’s loved me like a daughter my entire life, and I see the pain in those brown eyes of his.