Page 34 of Nocte
He says it so casually, which it is anything but. An asteroid has just struck, destroying my entire world in the violent aftermath—and it happens completely in utter silence.
Day will ascend. He will marry his chosen bride, his counterpart. He will live in wedded bliss in the high Citadel.
He will never ever see me again.
“You didn’t know.” His tone is cautious but relieved. I didn’t lie to him—I never would. Whatever fear he’s held silently has been put at ease. His smile returns, but this time… It’s nearly full and almost fills his eyes with mirth. “Are you happy for me?”
“Yes,” I croak. For him, ascension is everything. He will become a full Day with all the rights on the council. His purpose will be fulfilled.
I will be left behind. How selfish of me to care about that instance of his happiness. How greedy to want him to stay here forever.
“That isn’t all,” he says. “We are House Aurelius, the most pure. Due to our status, I can make decisions that others cannot.”
My mind is buzzing so loudly that I barely hear him. My body hurts. Brain hurts. My skull is two sizes too small, and my heart will soon grow tired of beating if the vamryre doesn’t leave soon. Boom. Boom. It hammers into me, overpowering whatever Day tells me next.
I only hear snippets.
“Choose my bride…”
But she’s already been chosen. His counterpart—our sister Day—as is custom. She’s been chosen for him since birth, destined since we all drew our first breath. She is everything I’m not, but jealousy isn’t what I feel.
In a sense, it is relief.
He’ll go live the rest of his life in bliss, and he’ll never see the mess of me that Caspian makes.
Because I saw his intentions clearly. I can almost hear him shouting them, even in the silent dark.
I’ll break you, little fae.
I’ll gobble you up whole.
“Goodbye, sister,” Day says. I realize he’s never left. Not yet.
As he does, my feet move of their own accord as if I mean to follow him out. Run. Chase. I’ve barely entered the ring of light that shrouds the main chamber when a hand comes from the shadows and yanks me back, back, back.
He drags me to the end of the archives and shoves me into a dark alcove where the candlelight can’t reach. He’s so heavy. I can’t move him, even when I press both hands to his chest and push. He is stone, crushing me, slowly, slowly…
He’s not. He has me pinned, both hands on my shoulders—my poor, injured shoulder—but his fingers shake. He wants to grip me tighter. Push me away. Then he compromises, bringing his face in close while letting his hands fall.
“Read to me,” he intones in a cruel mocking imitation of Day’s fae-like cadence. Coming from him, the accent sounds slippery. Sickly sweet. A mask. “Is that all he wants from you, the pretty fae? A story?”
He’s implying something. But what? I don’t know. It stings anyway. I try to press my body flat to the wall and squeeze past him.
He blocks me in so easily, and his mouth draws nearer to mine.
“Perhaps that is what I should make you do in exchange for my kindness? Read to me?”
“N-No,” I choke out. I never could. These books are sacred precious things that look so fragile in his hands as he snatches one from the nearest shelf. He rips it open to a random page. As his eyes scan the text something strange happens. Confusion. Irritation. Aggravation.
He throws the volume across the room and it hits the wall with a bang.
“No!” The poor, dear thing. Its cover is dented, forever mauled. All because I failed to protect it. I stoop and cradle it to my chest. Then I whirl around to face him and snarl, “You stupid brute!”
The words hang in the air, harsh and angry. Oh. I never say such things. Never ever. Day would be ashamed and shocked. He might swear never to visit me again.
Caspian laughs. Head cocked he advances, predatory again. Hungry for me once more. Paces away, he extends his hand.
I’d rather die than give him this book. I clutch it. Hold it so tightly my fingers turn white.