Page 20 of Controlled Burn

Caleb

On Monday morning, I was in the back working on a plan for our summer reading program when Giles stuck his head around the door.

“Hey, Caleb. Just thought I should let you know your firefighter is here. He’s even in his uniform.”

Keith was here? I glanced at the calendar to make sure I hadn’t missed something. I tried to be super careful and make sure everything landed on my calendar because, if it wasn’t there, I knew I would never remember it. But the calendar was blank.

“He isn’t my anything,” I told him for the hundredth time. I may have had a dream or two since I’d seen him at the club Saturday night that told a different story, but that wasn’t anyone else’s business.

“If you say so, but just so you know, he asked Bernadine if you were working today.”

“He probably just wants a book recommendation or to talk about his next storytime.” I stood up and headed out into the main library in search of him.

It didn’t take me long to find him, not only because I knew what kind of books he read, but also because he was pretty hard to miss. He was standing in the fiction section looking at the books, and I took advantage of his distraction to take a good look at him. He was wearing a pair of jeans that fit him like a glove, paired with a dark blue t-shirt that clung to his impressive muscles.

Not my firefighter, I reminded myself. Besides, he’d come to my rescue the other night, and even said I was a Daddy’s wet dream, but he didn’t do anything but take me home and drop me off. Not that I wanted him to. He was my dad’s friend, and he was a firefighter, but still, I was pretty sure if he was interested at all, he would’ve made a move then.

Someone on another aisle dropped something, and the sound made me aware of my surroundings and the fact that I’d been standing there watching him long enough to be creepy.

“Hey, Keith, I heard you were looking for me,” I said, moving down the row of books towards him.

He turned around and smiled at me. “I was thinking about checking out this series. Have you read it?” he asked, holding up one of Nnedi Okorafor’s books.

“I have. I think you would like it. A lot of her stories are based on actual conflicts but set in a post-apocalyptic fictional world.”

He nodded. “Cool, I think I’ll give it a shot.”

“Was that why you were looking for me?”

He glanced around, making sure we were alone. “It was one of the reasons. Our shift so far has been fairly uneventful, so I managed to slip away to return the book I’d checked out the last time I was here. Which means, I needed a new book, and your recommendations are usually spot on. But that wasn’t all.”

I cocked my head to one side and looked at him, waiting for him to tell me the other reason. But instead, he just chuckled and shook his head.

“What?” I asked, feeling a little defensive.

“Nothing, I’m just surprised it never occurred to me you were a boy before Saturday night.”

“I didn’t say I was a boy. I said I was curious.”

“Right, well, either way, I just wanted to stop by and make sure you were okay.”

“I’m fine, Keith. The guys were kind of jerks, but that was all.”

“I know, but even if you were just curious, it still couldn’t have been easy for you to show up like that on your own, and then it didn’t go great, so I wanted to make sure you’re alright.”

I knew he meant well, but the last thing I wanted to do was talk to a super hot Daddy about how foolish that whole night had made me feel.

“Keith, you may be a Daddy, but you aren’t my Daddy, so you don’t have to worry about me. I’m fine.”

He held up his hands in front of him. “You’re right, I’m not your Daddy, but I do consider you a friend.”

“No, you consider my father a friend. You barely know me, and I’m not your responsibility. But I appreciate your concern. Now, would you like to check out that book?” I did my best to sound like I was a grown-ass man who didn’t need his father’s buddy checking up on him, when the truth was him checking up on me gave me a warm feeling in the pit of my stomach that I didn’t want to examine too closely.

“Caleb,” he said in a firm but gentle voice, “if you’re really curious—”

“Nope. I was serious the other night. Curiosity satisfied. I’m good. I’ll just stick to the Daddies in my romance novels. Real-life Daddies don’t live up to the fantasy.”

He let out a sigh and shook his head. “I guess I’ll take this book and get on my way, then.” I reached out my hand for the book. He handed it over, but he didn’t let go right away, instead holding on tight to one side. “Seriously, Caleb, if you ever need to talk, you know where to find me.”