Page 18 of The Sad Omega

“Relax,” I told him. “We’re just going to talk. There’s nothing wrong, and you’re not in trouble.”

He took a sip of his hot chocolate. It seemed to give him courage. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, still refusing to look at me.

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” I told him. “You weren’t to know. I understand that things are different in your pack, but here… well, omegas make their own choices. They choose what jobs they want to do, who they mate with, and who they have sex with. Everyone pitches in for the pack but there’s no special treatment for alphas or betas. I’m responsible for the wellbeing of the pack overall, but I don’t get special rights and there are absolutely no sexual obligations between anyone in the pack, including me.”

I’d thought this would set his mind at rest, but instead he started sobbing. I just held him while he cried. Eventually, the tears dried to a sniffle, and he asked in a small voice, “Will Irian hate me now?”

“No,” I soothed. “I’ll talk to him. He’ll understand.”

There was no doubt in my mind that my kind-hearted mate would be totally understanding of Isca’s misstep, particularly as he was the one who had first brought to my attention his belief that things were not good for Isca back in his own pack. Whether my mate would be quite as understanding of my clear desire for the young omega was not so certain. I kicked myself again for not having brought this up with him sooner. I was not looking forward to the discussion we were going to have when he got back, but it was a discussion we couldn’t put off any longer.

We talked a little longer, but the emotions of the evening had been exhausting, and before long Isca fell asleep, wrapped up in Irian's housecoat, held safely against my side in the circle of my arm. When his soft snores ruffled the soft fabric of my housecoat, I scooped up the young omega and carried him to his room. Tucking the sheets in around him, I looked at his sleeping form for a moment. He snuggled into the bedsheets and stilled, his gentle snoring resuming. When he didn't move, I leaned down and feathered an affectionate kiss on his forehead before quietly closing the door as I left.

I tossed and turned until dawn sent its pale light through the windows. The evening had been unsettling. I sent messages of love through my mind-bond and hoped they would be enough to reassure my mate. I couldn’t help my body’s reaction to Isca, but there was no way I would ever betray my mate. Hurry home, I sent him through our bond, Isca’s upset. He needs you. I need you.

???

“You let him wear my dressing gown!” Irian accused. His cheeks were flushed, and it wasn’t with arousal.

Isca had already gone home, certain that Zarbius would return that day.

“It was better than having him walking around naked,” I retorted.

Irian grumbled.

“I’m sorry,” I told him, then I softened my voice, “I am attracted to him, I can’t pretend I’m not. I noticed a while ago and I should have spoken to you about it. Obviously I wasn’t going to act on it, but I got a huge shock when I saw him there, like that. That’s all it was.”

I’d explained the whole situation to Irian, and as I’d expected, he’d forgiven Isca straight away. I was having to work a whole lot harder, and I hadn’t done anything!

“At least I didn’t block our bond,” I told him, “If I was going to hide anything from you, I would have done that.”

Irian sniffed.

I went and stood in front of him, opening my arms to him. “Come here, my love. You know you mean the world to me.”

Irian pressed his body against mine, and we held each other tight. Then he sighed.

“It’s all right. He is distracting.” Irian looked up at me. He bit his lip uncertainly and looked a little shame-faced. “And… I’m not being fair. I find him hot too. I… It just shocked me that you felt the same way.”

Something about Irian's blush made me do a double-take. It was a full body blush-the pink stain creepingup his neck from his collar and then to his face.

“Irian,” I spoke gently, “I know Isca’s your friend but... do you have other feelings for him?”

Irian’s eyes flicked to my face, startled, and he took a step away from me. His head dropped. He remained silent for a moment.

Very subdued,he eventually whispered, “Maybe.”When I said nothing, he squirmed, digging his toe into the floor. “Yes.”

His head remained bowed, and he started shaking all over.

I stepped closer to him and wrapped him in my arms again, trying to comfort him. He sniffed, little sobs rocking his body.

“I’m sorry. I don’t understand what’s going on. I love you just as much as ever,” he choked out. He looked at me tearfully, eyes wide and wet, big fat teardrops streaming over the lids and running in glistening tracks down his cheeks. It broke my heart to see his confusion and dismay. He looked so vulnerable and even a little frightened.

“It’s all right,” I comforted him. “You do know there aren’t limits on feelings, don’t you? Hearts just grow bigger to accommodate them.”

Irian nestled into my chest, the shudders slowly easing. When he was quiet, I spoke.

“And, you know... ” I hesitated, unsure how he would take this, “I might be heading in that direction too.”