Page 32 of Becoming
“Uh-uh, nope. You’re not going anywhere.” She spread their linked hands and leered at her Rebecca in a way that made her feel much younger. And aroused. “Well, shit. I just figured out what my problem has been all along. I’ve been dating down when I should be dating up! If this is what forty-one looks like, sign me up!”
Rebecca couldn’t stop the smile if she tried, but it faded as quickly as it appeared. “And when we have nothing in common?” she asked.
“More to talk about.”
Another smile tugged at Rebecca’s lips. “Mmhmm. And when your parents and friends disapprove?”
Cassidy shrugged a shoulder. “I’m an adult, Rebecca. I’ve been making my own decisions for a while now. Besides, like I said, mom is older than dad.”
“Cassidy! I’m probably closer to their age than I am yours.” Ugh! I hate saying that! Her nose wrinkled in distaste.
“I don’t care. It’s my life, and I want you in it, Rebecca.”
She’s relentless! “Okay. How about when you’re thirty-five and I’m fifty-one?” Again, her nose crinkled. Must be a side-effect of their age gap. Or perhaps just her age. She was not a young, naïve woman anymore.
“Then I hope I can keep up with you.”
“You have an answer for everything, don’t you?”
“When something is important to me, yes,” Cassidy answered, squeezing Rebecca’s hands lightly. “Rebecca, you’re afraid you don’t know how to have a real relationship because you’ve never had one. But even if you had, all relationships are different. There’s no magic recipe. We work at it, and we find our own way. Nothing is a guarantee. Hell, you could wake up next week, and figure out I’m some immature idiot. It would devastate me, but at least I’ll know that I was courageous enough to give it a try. I’ve learned enough in the times I’ve been with you to know that I’m willing to take a risk. I know you’re scared, Rebecca. I’m scared, too. But, please, let me be the risk you take.”
They were all the right words. Everything she had wished she could have heard years ago. Yet, if she had, they wouldn’t mean as much as they did today. Rebecca searched for any signs of malice or dishonesty. She didn’t think Cassidy had it in her to be that cruel. Trust didn’t come easy for Rebecca, but for some reason, she trusted this woman. A woman she barely knew. A woman she had the overwhelming desire to…
“God, why can’t I stay away from you?” She pulled her hands from Cassidy’s and wrapped them around her neck. Taking a chance, she lowered her lips to Cassidy’s and kissed her.
REBECCA SAT IN her Mercedes trying not to hyperventilate. After kissing Cassidy, she agreed to come back to Cassidy’s place. Now, as she sat in front of the cute house, she wondered if she could go through with what Cassidy proposed.
“Go somewhere with me,” Cassidy murmured against Rebecca’s lips.
“Where?” God, it felt wonderful when Cassidy continued to feather kisses across her lips and cheeks.
“My place. Yours. Anywhere but the Pink Room.” She cupped Rebecca’s cheek. “I want to know what it’s like with you outside of that room, Rebecca. I want to make love with you.”
“I don’t know how,” Rebecca whispered with trepidation.
“Would you like to learn?” Cassidy asked, reminding Rebecca of their first time together. “We could teach each other.”
“Yes.”
Make love. How in the hell was she supposed to know how to do that? She was a virgin when she met Samantha. Lord knows the two of them never did anything that was anywhere close to loving. Making love to Cassidy meant shedding every defense she had. There was no mask, no control, no lifestyle to hide behind. Just her and Cassidy. Shit. Rebecca closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She trusted you, now it’s your turn to trust her.
She stepped out of the car, grateful that Cassidy hadn’t hovered or pressured her. The younger woman simply waited, then held her hand out to Rebecca when she was ready. Rebecca took Cassidy’s hand and squeezed it lightly. A silent thank you. The fact that Cassidy was trembling just as much as she was, made Rebecca feel a little better.
“This is a beautiful home.” She said it to get their minds off of why they were there. But, it was true. The modern design seemed to suit Cassidy, though it was much bigger than Rebecca expected from someone so young. No biased ideas, Rebecca. Go into this with an open mind. And heart.
Cassidy shrugged, still trying to get the door open. “It’s not much…”
“Cassidy, it’s beautiful,” Rebecca repeated forcefully. She never wanted Cassidy to be anything but proud of what she had and who she was.
“Thank you.” Cassidy finally got the door open and ushered Rebecca inside. “Would you, um, like something to drink?”
“Water is good,” Rebecca answered, taking in her surroundings. The main living area was open and airy. Filled with natural light from the oversized sliding glass doors that led to a private patio. Nice. And clean. She didn’t know why that surprised her.
“I have something stronger if you like.”
Oh, yeah. She’s definitely nervous, too. Time to be an adult. Rebecca smiled and traced a finger down Cassidy’s jaw. “I want to be completely sober for this, Cassidy.” She kissed Cassidy softly and stepped back.
“Be right back.” Cassidy gestured around them. “Make yourself at home.”