Page 62 of Tainted Blood
Despite the trauma.
Still, I feel like I’m back in another maze, one with Santi in the center and me skirting the periphery paths.
Please let me find a way back to him.
He steps into the room, kicking the door shut, and then moves to stand beside me.
“You did all this?” I ask, swinging back to the wall collage, feeling his body heat warming up my skin, even though we’re not touching.
“Zaccaria made it personal. I’m not resting until he’s dead.”
Santi’s changed. There’s a dangerous energy about him—a savageness doused in fury. I need him to hold me like he did when I was unconscious. Instead, he takes a step back and sits on the edge of his desk, reaching around for his decanter and pouring out two shots of Añejo tequila.
With the moment in pieces, I turn back to the wall again—my fingers straying to Monroe Spader’s photograph.
“I killed him,” I blurt out, unable to contain my dirty secret any longer.
“Good. You saved me a job.” But there’s an edge to his drawl that’s all guilt.
“I never wanted to be like you or my father. But this world…this fucking world…” I suck in a harsh breath. “It was only a matter of time before it turned me into a murderer, too.”
“It’s never murder when it’s self-defense. Or so my lawyers keep telling me.”
“You don’t understand,” I say, blinking back my tears. “You will never understand because killing is a way of life for you. When I kill, I don’t just take away their life. I destroy a part of mine as well.”
His dark gaze is burning a hole in the back of my head.
“Talk to me, Thalia. I’m not one for heart-to-hearts, but occasionally they’re warranted. This marriage is fucked without one.”
“What did Lola tell you?”
“She said it was your story to share, but only when you felt ready to. Told me if I rushed you, she’d slam my balls in a vise.”
“Did you see the m-maze?” The words get tangled up in my throat.
There’s a pause. “I watched it burn.”
“Thank you.”
Thank you for rescuing me, for finding me in the darkness, for being so much more than I ever thought you were…
Heading over to the window, I press my palms and forehead to the glass, as if I’m trying to force some sense into my madness. It’s late. A city of neon is reemerging. The cars down below are carving straight paths with yellow headlights.
It’s time to jump into nothing.
To see if he catches me.
To see if we’re strong enough to catch each other…
“I know why you didn’t tell me about Bardi and the tape.”
There’s another pause at this, followed by clinking glass and pouring liquid.
“I think I knew the last time we were in this office together,” I add, bracing myself when I hear his footsteps approaching.
“Enlighten me,” he murmurs, slamming his large hands over mine—his wedding band gleaming bright in the declining light. A beat, later, he’s pressing his hard body against me and sparking that flame between us, all over again. “What do you think you know, muñequita?”
“It’s the same reason why you burned this world to the ground to find me.” Feeling his lips feathering my neck, I tilt my head, daring him to sink his lust into me. “The same reason you saved Sam’s life. The same reason you walked into a room with my father and Edier, knowing they had a bullet carved with your name on it… The same reason you’ve spent nine days holding me, bringing me back to life. The same reason why you saved me ten years ago in the snow, when you had every opportunity to kill me.”