Page 26 of Vicious Temptation
Don’t worry about that right now, I tell myself, taking a deep breath. Worry about it when the time comes. For now, just spend this hour relaxing.
I’m not done with the thriller I picked out yet, so I go and get it, retreating back into the library to read by myself for a little while longer. I can feel myself starting to relax a little more, getting more used to what is now, really, my new home.
For a while, at least. Today has gone well, so far. It gives me hope that maybe this place will continue to be my home, that Gabriel will be happy enough with the job I’m doing that he’ll want me to stay. That Danny and Cecelia will like me, and they’ll want me to stay, too.
I sink into one of the comfy chairs in the library—big enough for me to sink into it and tuck my feet up under me—and lose myself in my book for a little while. The book is scary, and tense, which might be a surprising choice considering the fact that not so long ago, I was in a horrific, scary situation. But this feels different, removed from what happened to me, someone else’s fear and panic—and a distinct impression that in the end, the final girl will win the day. She’ll escape, and in time, she’ll be okay.
When the hour is up, Cecelia comes into the library, her hair frizzing out of the braids she put it in after the pool. “Danny is still sleeping,” she says, with the air of an older sister getting some satisfaction out of tattling on her younger sibling, and I laugh, setting my book on the table next to my armchair.
“Okay. Let’s go wake him up, then,” I tell her, and we walk companionably out of the library together, already a little more at ease than she was with me last night.
Cecelia wakes Danny up by bouncing on his bed, something that I’m not sure if I’m supposed to allow but seems harmless enough, and then we go to the movie room to watch something semi-educational. Danny plays with the Pac-Man arcade game while I sift through the National Geographic channel, finally settling on a nature documentary about the Galapagos while the two of them pop popcorn and come to sit on the long, comfy sectional couch next to me. The time flies by, and I’m so relaxed that I nearly jump out of my skin when Cecelia pops up suddenly, looking at the clock.
“Dad should be home!” she says, making a beeline for the door, and Danny follows her. I switch off the television, following them out to the entryway, where I see Gabriel taking off his shoes and setting down his messenger bag.
I’m struck, in that moment, by two things. One, how utterly normal this all feels—at this moment, Gabriel is just a father coming home from his job, greeting his children after a day at work. Not a white-collar criminal, or an associate of the mafia, or a man who likely engages in sketchy and shady business dealings with men like my father. And I feel certain, even after just this brief amount of time with this family, that he does this on purpose. He’s making certain that his children, robbed of their mother so early, have as much normalcy as they can in a life where they’re still living in a privileged position of extreme wealth.
And the second thing that strikes me is how gorgeous Gabriel is.
I shouldn’t notice it. Truthfully, it surprises me that I do, because I haven’t noticed a man’s looks in a long time—not since my wedding. But it’s impossible not to. His soft, dark hair falls into his face as he sets his bag down, the muscles of his forearms flexing where his shirt is rolled up above his elbows, and his hazel eyes sparkle when he sees his children running towards him. I see the hint of dark chest hair in the small open space at the top of his shirt, and the veined, long-fingered shape of his hands as he shoves them into his pockets, grinning at the two oncoming tornadoes who fling themselves at him.
Gabriel is my boss. My employer. A man who has made it abundantly clear that he has no room for romance or probably even attraction in his life. And even if he did, it wouldn’t be with me. Because, as always, as soon as my mind starts to move past that brief moment of attraction—as soon as I imagine those hands touching me, sliding up my arms, brushing against my face to turn my mouth towards his for a kiss?—
—cold nausea sweeps over me, my stomach knotting and my breath catching in my chest, making me press my hand to my ribs as I come to an abrupt halt. Gabriel looks up, a smile on his face, and then I see the creases around his eyes as the smile drops, just a little.
“Are you alright?” He looks at me, and I nod quickly.
“Fine. Just—a little bit of a headache. Being out in the sun—” I trail off, hating that I’m lying. But I can’t tell him the truth without having to unravel so much that I don’t want to talk about, that I can’t talk about, that I especially wouldn’t be able to explain right here and now.
“You two run off and find Agnes,” Gabriel says, glancing down at Cecelia. “I want to catch up with Bella.”
My stomach drops, and I twist my fingers together, my hands in front of me as I wait to hear what he’s going to say. As I wait to find out whether or not he’s going to dig deeper into the question he asked me a moment ago.
“How did it go today?” he asks, the smile returning to his face. “I hope they weren’t too much trouble.”
“Not at all,” I assure him quickly. “They were wonderful.”
I give him a quick rundown of everything we did over the day, and my spirits lift when I see the pleased expression on his face. “That all sounds perfect,” Gabriel says, nodding. “I’m sure Agnes appreciated the break, too. I don’t have any complaints—it sounds like you all figured out how to spend the day just fine. And they’re getting along with you?”
I nod. “Cecelia seems to be warming up to me, too. I think it just takes some time, and patience.”
“I agree.” Gabriel flashes me another smile. “I’m going to change and catch up with them. Consider yourself ‘off’ for the day, although, as always, I’d love it if you joined us for dinner. I believe Agnes and Aldo will be eating with us tonight as well. I know at our dinner out, you said you didn’t have any eating restrictions, but please tell Agnes if you do, and you were just being polite. She’ll be happy to accommodate you.”
“I really don’t. But thank you.” I hesitate, feeling awkward suddenly. “I’ll—see you at dinner, then?”
“Perfect.” Gabriel nods, and walks away.
A fine tremor runs through me as I let out a breath of relief. I’d been so worried that today wouldn’t go well, that I would do it all wrong, and Gabriel would be upset with me, but it seems clear that I didn’t have anything to worry about.
There’s still a couple of hours until it’s dark out, and I consider what I might do until dinner. I could go out to the pool alone, and I consider it—I think the landscapers have left, and I haven’t seen anyone else outside—but even if I’m pretty sure no one will go out to the pool other than me, the idea of just the possibility makes me feel shaky and queasy.
The other option that occurs to me is to go for a run. It’s been a couple days since I’ve gotten any exercise other than packing, and Gabriel mentioned a path that loops around the estate. With that decided, I go upstairs and change into a pair of leggings and a lightweight, long-sleeved running top, scraping my hair up into a ponytail before slipping through the house and out of a backdoor.
Outside, it’s starting to cool off, with the afternoon’s heat fading into a pleasant temperature. I tighten the laces on my sneakers and start walking, stretching a little as I look for the path that Gabriel mentioned. I find it before too long, a gravel path that starts near the garden just past the pool house, and I start running at a slow jog, looking around as I do.
I’m not sure how much property Gabriel has, exactly, but it looks like his estate is fairly large. I jog around the garden, and I can’t help but think of bringing my camera out here and taking photos of it soon. The landscaping is beautiful, varying flowers and rows of shrubbery along neatly kept paths, and the greenhouse on one side that Gabriel had mentioned Cecelia liked. I make a mental note to join them out there sometime, and use that to get to know Cecelia a little better.
Further out, the path leads to the mostly unused, rolling green expanse of the estate. Off to one side, I see a small brick cottage with a front porch and a tiny garden on one side, and I realize that must be where Agnes and Aldo live. A truck and a small sedan are parked out front, and I feel that sense of home again that I feel every time I’m around anyone who lives here. Not for myself, not yet—but the feeling that this can be a home, a real one. My father would have an aneurysm at the idea of staff living on-site, in our house or near it, rather than commuting each day regardless of how early or late they might need to travel to do so, even though we arguably have more space in our house than Gabriel does. It seems clear that he intentionally chose to live in a smaller home, something that can’t quite be called a mansion, for that sense of normalcy that seems to pervade everything he does.