Page 41 of Stay With Me
I couldn’t resist. Mostly because, deep down, I didn’t want things to end at all. But I knew they had to.
And my point was proven.
As for Roman, he’s texted me nonstop and filled up my mailbox with voicemails. I haven’t read or listened to anything he sent. I know what they’ll say. It would be him asking to talk, to work things out.
I don’t get how he can’t see that it’s not possible. Things are over. I’ve lost the man I’ve fallen so hard for, the man who stole my heart, and the girl who’s been my best friend pretty much my whole life.
Now, I have nothing and no one. I’ve been staying at an extended-stay hotel, only going back to the apartment when I know Tasha won’t be there. I grab clean clothes and take a shower before leaving again. Thankfully, she hasn’t changed the locks yet.
I can’t live like this forever. I just don’t know where I stand with Tasha. Does she want me out? Is she going to move out?
Before, I couldn’t afford that place on my own, but with the money I made from my week with Roman, I could not only pay off my student loans but I could live off the rest of it for a short while.
A few days after the whole blow-up, I looked in my account to see if I had enough money for a coffee, and I found a life-changing amount of money instead. It wasn’t even the amount that Roman and I talked about. There’s a good extra few hundred thousand in there.
I’m not sure if I’m going to use the money; I don’t think I’d feel right about it. And if I did, I sure as hell wouldn’t be using anything but what we agreed to.
To sum it up, my life is a mess right now. I’m miserable, I haven’t cried so much in my life, and I miss Roman. I miss Tasha.
“See you tomorrow,” Ruby, one of the night girls, says as I sign out after my shift.
“Bye.” I give her a forced smile and make my way out to my car.
Getting inside, I look out the window and sigh as I place my head against the steering wheel.
I have to do it. I can’t avoid it forever.
Grabbing my phone, I send Tasha a text, asking her if she was at the apartment and if she was able to talk.
After a minute that felt more like a lifetime, I get a text back saying just one word: okay.
Biting my lip, nervousness fills my belly as I pull out of the diner parking lot and head to my apartment.
I’m a wreck when I step inside my place ten minutes later. “Tasha?” I call out.
She steps out of her room, hair tossed up in a messy bun. She’s dressed in sleep shorts and a loose top, looking like she’s been in bed all day.
“Hey.” She pauses, meeting my eyes. I see a look of pain pass through them, and my heart hurts.
“Hi,” I say softly.
“Well, let’s do this,” she deadpans, moving over to the couch. I tentatively move over to sit on the other side.
“First, I want to say I am so sorry. I didn’t mean for you to see that. It should never have happened.”
“Trust me,” she snorts. “That’s something I could have gone my whole life without seeing.”
“I know. And I’m so, so sorry.”
She nods, not looking at me as she plays with the blanket she pulled over her lap. “Can I ask you a few things?”
“Anything. I’ll tell you anything you want to know,” I say immediately.
“Was he the older guy you’ve been seeing for work?”
“Yes,” I sigh, nodding.
“I wish you said no,” she sighs, looking up at me.