Page 13 of Risk

Keeping the giggles and teasing going for another ten minutes, I talk about mediocre bullshit and ask them if they like my new lipstick, even reapplying it so they can get a good look at my mouth. “Mmmm, this needs lip gloss. What flavor should I do?”

They eat this shit up. These guys love picking lip-gloss flavors, even if they never get to taste it.

“Watermelon? Okay.” I pump the tube of lip gloss suggestively before slathering it on my bottom lip. Then rub it in and pucker for them. “Mmmm, how’s that look?”

I’ve had no less than ten more kisses fly across the screen. A hundred bucks for putting on lip-gloss? That’s the definition of working smarter, not harder.

Another notification pops up on the right side of the screen.

X would like a private chat. Do you accept?

Hmmm. This is one of the new patrons that joined today. I really don’t have the energy to give him my best, but I also don’t want to lose him so soon by declining. Rejecting one man today was enough.

“Well, guys, this little bunny needs to go to bed. Thanks for keeping me company. Good night.” I blow the camera a kiss and log off the live chat screen. Yawning, I accept X’s request.

The only thing that shows up on the screen are his legs in black suit pants. He’s stretched out on what looks like a white couch.

“Hi.” I lean back in my chair. “You’re new.”

X: You’re gorgeous.

“Aww. Thank you.” I cast my eyes down for a moment, then look back at the camera sheepishly again. “How was your day?” I have no clue yet how shy this guy is, or if he just likes anonymity. I also don’t know if he likes a confident or meek woman. I’ll figure it out.

X: Busy.

“Ugh, life gets so exhausting, doesn’t it? Always go, go, go with no time to take a deep breath and just… be.” I sigh loudly.

X: Long day for you too?

“Yes. I’m always running around for work. It’s nice to just be home.”

X: You should get in bed. Relax a little. You deserve it.

I really like when someone gives me orders in the bedroom. Part of me melts because I don’t have to think. I just do. But Daisy Ren can’t afford that luxury. I only give the illusion that I’m submitting to what they want me to do. I’m still forever on guard and steering conversations where I want, though. It makes conversations like this tedious because I’m constantly running a million situations in my head to improvise our interaction in a way that benefits me more than them.

But sometimes, I just want to let go. Give in. Obey like a good girl.

“Mmmm.” I stretch my arms over my head and arch my back. “Getting in bed sounds soooo good.”

I don’t normally leave this room, but occasionally I’ve taken a patron into another part of my house. It makes me more personable and easier to converse with, even though I don’t like how they get to see more of my personal space. But sometimes the littlest things turn into a deeper connection. And sometimes those deeper connections turn into big cash rewards.

A guy once paid two hundred dollars to watch me clean dishes in just an apron. Another wanted me to play video games with him while dressed in my pink glitter bunny outfit and paid me a grand for it. And plenty pay for me to talk dirty to them while they get off on just seeing me squirm in my chair.

I have mixed feelings about it. On one hand, I like the power, control, the exchanges we have. I like being watched and enjoyed. Sometimes I pretend to use a vibrator to get off with while they’re jerking themselves. But they never see the action on my end. I haven’t gone that far yet.

And part of me wants to, really bad.

Exhibition kink? Yeah, I have one.

Voyeurism? Definitely.

It’s been a strange, self-discovering journey over the past couple of years. Sadly, I haven’t found a partner to have fun with. It’s not as easy as one may think. Lots of people like almost getting caught.

I want to get caught.

There’s been a few opportunities to join a sex club, but I keep chickening out. For someone who’s so bold with everything, I’ve really backpedaled on diving into the kind of sex I like.

I fell into this gig on a whim one night. Impulsive and frustrated, I dove headfirst into being a camgirl. Never thought I’d be good at it. I definitely didn’t expect to like it so much either. The hint of intimacy is enough to satisfy my guarded heart. Plus, I get to see men come undone over something I do for them, which is so fucking addictive.