Page 23 of Twisted Heathens
“I’m trying to protect you,” Kade says evenly.
I can tell by the way his lips are pressed together that he wants to say more. Hell, he probably wants to hit me too. Scream in my face. Punish me for abandoning our family and ruining the perfect life I’d been given.
I’ve got to make him let go. To stop caring about me, the waste of space that I am. He’s stuck here, chasing after me and trying to clear up messes that don’t belong to him. He’s the success story. The good kid that grew into a great man.
Hurting him is the only way to set him free.
“It’s not your job to protect me. It never was,” I state coldly, watching him flinch. “We’re not family. We’re not brothers. We’re not even friends. Get that into your head, before it’s too late.”
He stares at me with wide eyes and I fight the urge to rub my chest. Just saying it hurts, that’s the worst part. I’m not that kind of person. Yeah, I’m an asshole. But Kade and his family are the best thing that ever happened to me.
“I was…once.”
Kade’s voice is a harsh whisper, choked with emotion. I stand abruptly, tossing the crushed can down and storming away. I can’t look back at him, can’t see the broken look on his face. A look that I put there. It’ll finish me off.
Just walk away. It’s safer.
I’m out the door and nearly running when two familiar faces slow my steps. Fucking hell, there’s no escaping it tonight. These guys are everywhere, showing up to pile on some more guilt for my shitty behaviour of late. Goddammit.
“Hud! Hold up!” Phoenix hollers.
He’s entering the building with Eli in tow, both of them seemingly surprised to see me. I run a hand through my hair, scrambling for an excuse to avoid them. I feel like shit, they’re my friends but I just can’t do it tonight. Not after that conversation.
“Hey,” I answer.
“Where are you off to? We’ve got someone for you to meet.”
“Not tonight. I’m… I’ve got work to do.”
Phoenix frowns, and even Eli looks suspicious. They know me too well sometimes. “You sure? Trust me, you don’t want to miss this. She’s a breath of fresh air.”
I begin to inch away. “Nope, I’m good. Catch up later.”
Phoenix shrugs, turning his back. Eli smiles weakly and follows suit. My excuses are transparent but they’re good enough not to press further. Unlike Kade, who can’t take no for an answer.
I jog away, my mind set on one destination. Out into the drizzling rain, through the dark night and into another building. She’s got a project due, so the art room is a good place to start. I’m right of course, but as soon as I stride into the room, her face hardens.
“Seriously Hudson, fuck off. Not today.”
“Come on, Britt. I’m sorry for being a douchebag,” I lie easily.
“Are you?” she challenges, slamming the paintbrush down.
I know just what to say, it’s like a routine by this point. We fuck, fight, argue, then fuck some more. Truthfully, I hate it. Britt’s using me as much as I’m using her. There’s nothing deep about it, but when she tries to demand more from me, we run into difficulties. Last time, I literally threw her out. I couldn’t stand the sight of her for a second longer than necessary.
“I am, baby. Forgive me?” I squeeze the words out. Liar.
Abandoning my morals once more in pursuit of a temporary fix. I don’t suppose I deserve anything better than this. Not after the things I’ve said and done. This misery is all I’m allowed, nothing more.
Britt hops up onto the workbench, quickly spreading her legs. I launch across the room without hesitating. Positioning myself between her legs, I shove the stupid flowery dress up to her waist, yanking the thong down her thin legs. I should be worried about hurting her one day, anorexics have brittle bones. But again, it’s not my problem. I don’t care if I break her. Might actually be fun.
“Oh, by the way…” she starts.
I free my rock-hard dick. “Do you have to talk right now?”
“Calm down, no need to be an ass. I was going to tell you about the new girl.”
Wrapping my hand around her throat, I squeeze hard enough to shut her up. “I don’t give a fuck about the new girl. Got that?”