Page 27 of Escape

What I hated about this was knowing that I’d done this to Huck. Ultimately, I had wanted to seek his help and get some self-defense training to be proactive about keeping myself safe, but I didn’t see a way to do that without Kurt cottoning on. Not only was time a factor in the equation, but money was an issue, too. A big issue, in fact. Every dollar I was able to keep out of my tips had to be set aside for my move out of his place. It was more necessary now than ever.

Now, I was sitting here with Huck, and we had finished our pies in the tense, awkward silence. The fact that I wound up here was a problem. I’d told myself two days ago that I couldn’t allow myself to continue getting distracted by Huck, and yet, I caved within seconds of seeing him again.

It was difficult not to, though. For me, he was like the sunlight peeking out from behind the dark clouds on a stormy day. It might have been the start of summer, but it had been a long time since I’d seen the sun.

The decision I’d made a couple of days ago to keep myself away from Huck until I could get away from Kurt had all been a means of self-preservation. It was a rash decision in the heat of a torturous moment. Obviously, I couldn’t stop Huck from coming into the diner, but I did have a choice when it came to letting thoughts of him invade my mind or agreeing to sit and have pie with him.

The smarter thing to do today would have probably been to decline the invitation. I had been prepared to do just that. But then it hit me. At the end of the day, if Kurt decided he was going to kill me, I figured it was better to have had some special moments with Huck before it happened.

That didn’t mean I wanted things to get to that point. I planned to do everything I could to save myself from a fate like that. But on the off chance I got it wrong, at least if I enjoyed some pie with Huck, not everything in my life would have been disappointing.

So, I went against the rule I’d made and decided to have pie with him. I just wished things had gone better between us.

Because now I had to leave. I couldn’t stay much longer and still make it home on time to cook dinner before Kurt returned from work. But I didn’t want to leave things like this with Huck.

I lifted my mug of tea to my lips one last time and took a sip. I told myself I needed it to soothe my painfully tight throat, but the truth was that I did it to stall.

As soon as I set the mug down, I began nervously playing with the handle of it and lamented, “I’m sorry.”

Curiosity washed over his expression. “What are you apologizing for?”

“You invited me to join you for pie, and it was supposed to be nice. I wanted it to be nice. But my situation ruined it, and I’m so embarrassed,” I explained, dropping my gaze to the table.

Huck reached his arm across the table and covered my hand with his. My eyes shot to his as the warmth and comfort of his gentle touch seeped in. He had such an adoring look on his face. “You have nothing to feel ashamed about, and I do not need or want an apology from you, Josie. Not for this.”

“But this was ruined,” I noted. “I’m sure you didn’t come here intending to sit in this awkward space with me.”

His hand offered a reassuring squeeze before his thumb began stroking over the skin on the back of my hand. It was something so simple, but to me, it meant the world. It was the sweetest gesture. I wasn’t sure I knew it was possible for a man to be so gentle, but I should have known that if anyone could be that way, it would be Huck.

“I think you’re underestimating me. I’d be willing to sit in a lot of spaces with you, especially the ones that might be a bit uncomfortable for you,” he revealed.

God, he made it impossible not to get emotional. Huck stood for everything I wanted in my life, everything I hoped I could eventually have one day. Tears filled my eyes, and I tipped my head to the side. “I don’t know what to say,” I rasped. “But I have to go, and I just don’t want to leave here feeling like you’re upset with me.”

“I could never be upset with you, honey. That’s a promise I can make to you.”

And there was that.

Huck called me honey, and it felt as though he’d handed me the whole world, especially when the softness in his voice matched the tenderness in his touch.

Before I could summon the courage to respond, Huck spoke again. “I don’t know how I can do this, though.”

“Do what?”

He hesitated to respond, his eyes roaming over my face in a way it seemed as though he was attempting to memorize it for fear he’d never seen me again. There was a hopeless desperation lingering there. “Please don’t make me watch you go back to him. I’m begging you to let me help you.”

The sound of his voice was ragged; it nearly undid me. And he’d gone from gently stroking his thumb over the skin on the back of my hand to holding on to it like it was as crucial to his survival as food and water.

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what to do.

Huck wasn’t finished. His tortured voice continued, “I’ve been sitting here in this silence, trying to come up with a plan to convince you not to go back there. No less than a dozen thoughts have crossed my mind about how to make that happen. But after what you’ve been through, I don’t want to be the man who drags you out of here against your will to force you to do something you’re not ready to do.”

I could have cried. It would have been easy to burst into tears at just how well Huck understood what I needed. At the same time, I didn’t want him to think I didn’t appreciate what he was saying, or that I didn’t agree with it.

“I am ready,” I assured him. “If it was possible, I would have been out long before you even walked into this diner.”

“It is possible. Please, Josie, please let me help you,” he begged.

Pain had leaked into every single one of Huck’s features. He was feeling tortured by this, and it was me who was inflicting this pain on him.