Page 88 of First Ritual
Rooke blurted, “Do I even want to know more? This is messed up.”
Maybe this was pretty strange. Scrap that, this went beyond strange. “Yep. Totally weird, we’re aware. As said, Wild and I want out of this situation. We’re not interested in each other that way.” I tapped my lip. “On any level, really.”
Wild glanced at me. “I’d be friends with you.”
That sidetracked me well and truly. “You would?”
“You wouldn’t?”
I considered that. “I hadn’t put much thought toward it. If I did decide to let you be my friend, it would only be because I’ve been forced to know you better despite my every intention. Is that real friendship?”
He rolled his eyes and sank farther into the water.
My eyes zipped to his torso. I’d mostly seen it through the loose V necklines of his tunics, but I didn’t want to miss his chest glistening with water. I tore my focus back to Rooke. “The guys think the answer lies in my past because I’m the messed-up one.”
“The block in your divination affinity?” she guessed.
“Perhaps. Does your offer of help still stand? Full disclosure, I’ve never gone back without chaos claiming me for a time.”
Her eyes rounded. “How long?”
“A week last time.”
Five sharp inhales.
The tether I shared with Rooke burned bright.
“I’m so sorry that happened to you,” she said softly.
So was I. Chaos was a shit time.
She worried at her lip. “I don’t have much experience in sharing journeys.”
Corentin said, “I do. We can go through things while she purifies. And we’ll all be there.”
“Not there,” I argued.
Wild hooked an arm around my neck and dragged me close until his lips were against my ear. “We’re there. For her safety.”
I hadn’t considered that. Not that chaos had ever made me hurt anyone. I just went wandering for a bit and woke up elsewhere and then had to hold onto my will to survive until things hopefully passed. I’d woken once back at the site where my family was murdered. Another time at my childhood house.
Another time in the complete and utter wilderness.
Spinning in Wild’s hold, I took a deep breath and rested a hand on his chest over his ruby pendant. His skin rippled and transfixed me for a timeless beat. I met his gaze. “Can you promise that you won’t ever use what you see against me?”
A tension gripped him. His regard was unfaltering. “I give you my absolute word, darling. I will never wield what I see to hurt you. Not a single hair on your head.”
His sincerity made my insides feel squirmy, and not in a good way. Why’d he have to be so damn intense and convincing? The darling thing… I’d never heard him casually use endearments before. I wished he wouldn’t use them with me. “Cool. Thanks.”
The others were waiting for our exchange to end.
I told them, “Okay, you guys can come.”
Sven snorted. “We were always coming, small woman. Just like you in the library.”
I glared.
“The next question is when,” Huxley said over Corentin’s quiet laughter.