Page 21 of Redemption
But the more I thought about it, the more surprised I was. Because I actually meant it.
“He’s super nice,” Brooklyn gushed. “I knew you’d like him.”
“Hey, B?” Emerson ruffled Brooklyn’s hair, meeting my eyes over the top of her head. “Why don’t you see if the chef can rustle up a charcuterie board.”
“Okay!” Brooklyn popped up and disappeared down the hall to the kitchen.
“Hey,” Emerson said in a softer tone. “Are you okay?”
“I…” I glanced away, not sure what to say or if I even should. I liked Emerson. Thought she was perfect for Nate and Brooklyn. But I wasn’t sure I wanted to divulge my past with Jackson to her—or anyone.
I’d kept our relationship a secret all these years. Why stop now?
“I’m fine.” I only hoped my smile looked more convincing than it felt.
I was still trying to grapple with the fact that my ex was going to be my bodyguard.
It had been easier to forget about him when we were living separate lives, but now, we’d be sharing a boat. And all the feelings I’d forgotten or suppressed seemed determined to resurface.
“Mm.” She smiled. “I know you say that. And I know you want it to be true, but I sense you don’t quite believe it yourself.”
Was I really that transparent?
“I—” I gaped at her.
She flashed me a warm smile and leaned in. “I’ve been in your shoes. Many times. Pretending I’m fine when I’m anything but.”
“You mean since announcing your engagement to Nate?” I couldn’t fathom living with the level of publicity and scrutiny they dealt with on a regular basis. It had to be exhausting.
“Yes, but even before. I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s okay not to be okay.” She placed her hand on my forearm. “And I’m here if you want to talk.”
“Thanks.” I swallowed past the lump in my throat, overwhelmed by her generosity. I didn’t have many girlfriends. And even though Emerson was younger than me, she was wise. Genuine.
“I know what it’s like to have people invade your space,” she continued. “To have your life turned upside down without your consent. To suddenly have a bodyguard. And if I didn’t have my best friend, Kendall, and Nate, I don’t know how I’d get through it.”
“You’d find a way.” Of that, I had no doubt.
Emerson was an Olympic gold medalist. She was an incredible athlete. She was perfect for Nate, but she was also the type of woman I’d always expected Jackson to end up with—beautiful, ambitious, athletic. She was like a ray of sunshine.
Which got me wondering, not for the first time, about Jackson’s relationship status.
If he was going on a two-month sailing trip with me surely he wasn’t married, right? I couldn’t imagine his wife being okay with that kind of assignment. I sure as hell wouldn’t be if I were in her shoes.
Greer hadn’t mentioned there being anyone serious in Jackson’s life, but he didn’t tell her everything. I knew that from experience.
And the idea of Jackson having a wife made me sick to my stomach. I placed a hand there to quell my growing nausea.
“Sloan?” Emerson asked. “Are you sure you’re okay? You look pale.”
“I am pale,” I joked. “I live in London, and I’m rarely outside.”
She eyed me with a healthy amount of skepticism but didn’t push. Instead, she asked, “How’s Edward?”
“Fine.” At least, I assumed he was. We’d barely spoken all week. So, I tacked on, “Busy as ever,” because that seemed more accurate.
“I’m sure it takes a toll on your relationship.” I knew she was speaking from personal experience. She and Nate juggled a lot, but they always seemed to make Brooklyn and their relationship with each other the priority.
“It does.”