Page 21 of Silver Linings
“Your mom needs her medicine and then I’ve got to do her hand casting.”
“I can bring her whatever she needs, but what the hell is a hand casting?”
“It’s where you make a mold of someone’s hand and then pour it with plaster. It will make a casting of her hand that you’ll be able to keep after she’s gone.”
“Was that her idea?”
“No,” she said as she wiped away another tear. “It was mine. I was thinking about the things I would have liked to have from my own parents.”
“Your parents aren’t dead, Lily.”
“No, I’m just dead to them, I guess.”
“They could come around.”
“I don’t think I want them to at this point. Sprout deserves more than whatever scraps of emotional support they would give her. Just like you deserve more than taking me on as some sort of charity project.”
“I don’t see you as a charity project.”
“How could you not? I have nothing to offer you, Gunner. A marriage between us would be solely for my benefit, and that isn’t fair to you. I have nothing to give you.”
“That’s not true, Lil. You’d be giving me a family.” Damn, the truth of that sucker punched him right in the gut. “I never,” Gunner ran his hand over his chin. “Look, I never thought about having a wife and kids before, other than to know it wouldn’t be in the cards for me. There aren’t a lot of women who want to take on living life as a single married woman.”
“What do you mean?”
“When I was a SEAL, constantly going out on missions, I didn’t have time to be thinking about anyone back home. Just ask mom, or Gia. I only know how to focus on my team. My mission.”
“But you aren’t in the Navy anymore.”
“No, but that doesn’t mean I’ve left the danger behind, Lil. There are still missions to go on, teams to be a part of where the objectives are classified, and the likelihood of being hurt is high. What my team is working on in Texas right now, the people they are trying to take down, it’s dangerous.”
“If you can only focus on your mission, on your team in the field, why would you want me to be there as a distraction? Why take on me and Sprout?”
Gunner looked around the living room and sighed. If there was ever a time to be honest with someone, now was it. He might want her to say yes for her own benefit, but he also knew she needed to hear the words he was about to say.
“I’ve always wondered what it would be like to come home to a house filled with happiness, instead of silence. Maybe I’d like to have someone to spend time with when my team has pissed me off and I need to get away from them for a while. I want to have someone at home to tell me about their day and distract me from whatever tough jobs I may have just gotten back from.”
Gunner placed his hand on her shoulder, pressing down until she finally sat. “I mean it, Lil. You and Sprout would be giving me the greatest gift. Please, just think about it a little more seriously.”
“Why are you being so nice to me?”
“It’s been a long time since I did my medical crash course. Can’t have you go into labor on my watch.” He thought that would at least get a little smile from her, but as he watched the tears not only fill her eyes, but splash over her lashes with a sob, he felt lost. “What’s wrong, Lily?”
“Nothing. Bring t-those pills to your mom. I’ll be fine in a minute.”
Lost as to what set her off, Gunner gathered his mom’s medications, double checking the tracking sheet Lily had placed in the kitchen. Marriage was going to be tough, but doubly so if everything he said made Lily either so mad she wouldn’t look at him, or even worse, she cried.
Eight
“Good morning.” Lily’s small voice jolted him out of his thoughts.
“Morning,” he said as he took her in. She’d clearly been up for some time before deciding to come out and join him. Her hair was done up in a fancy braid, and she’d left little wisps out to frame her freckled face. His eyes followed her as she walked to the coffeepot and poured herself a cup. Lily must have seen the surprised look on his face when she turned back around because she shrugged her shoulders and mumbled something about being allowed one cup of coffee a day.
He laughed at that. Like he’d known anything about pregnancy and what was and wasn’t okay during it. He certainly wouldn’t begrudge her coffee, especially when he’d heard her get up several times during the night to use the bathroom. One thing about Gia and Gunner’s rooms that weren’t ideal was the fact that they were both connected to the same bathroom. Shit. He should have checked in with Lily before to see if she was comfortable with that arrangement.
“You look nice today,” he mumbled into his coffee cup. And she did. It wasn’t just her hair. She had on a sundress that clung to her curves like it was custom made for her. The emerald green fabric, covered in little white flowers, worked perfectly with her hair and seemed to make her green eyes even more vibrant.
“Thank you. I always imagined wearing a green dress on my wedding day.”