Page 20 of Sworn to Defend
There was a knock on the car window, and she jumped. “Shh. It’s okay. Silver is just here to get your keys.”
“My keys?” Her nose was stuffed up from crying.
“Yeah, baby. To take your car home so I can drive you.”
She sucked in a breath, touched at the lengths this man and his team would go to keep one of their own safe. She’d never belonged to anyone before. It felt nice. She reached into her pocket and drew out her key fob. Warm air seeped into the car when Hunter rolled down the window. She angled her chin to glance up at Silver. When he looked at her, empathy flashed in his dark blue eyes. “It takes its toll, being on front lines. You’re one of us. A warrior. But even warriors need to offload the burden. Let Branch carry some of it, darlin’.” Silver shocked her by placing his hand on the top of her head, like an older brother might. A fresh wave of tears threatened. Silver was talking to Hunter now, and she let the conversation fade around her. When Hunter kissed her temple and inhaled her scent, she was surprised to find them alone again with the window rolled up. God, maybe she’d passed out on him.
“I’m sorry—”
“No apologies. Nothing to be sorry for. Do you remember what Silver told you?”
She didn’t say anything, not because she couldn’t remember his words, but because he was so wrong. There was nothing remotely comparable between her and Hunter’s SEAL team. She wouldn’t deny the importance of her job or even that she was some people’s last shot at survival, but no one could convince her that her sacrifices, her trauma, compared to someone in the armed forces.
“You need to let some of the weight go. Give it to me to carry. Talk it out with a professional who can help unravel the anger and guilt.”
“How do you know I feel that?” Because she did. God, she did. Scenarios rolled through her brain of things she could’ve done differently. Better.
“Because that’s what I feel in the field. What we all do. We both see the worst of the worst, Han. The saddest shit imaginable. There’s no shame in seeking help.”
“What I do, what I see on a daily basis pales in comparison to you and your team. I get to come home at the end of my shift and see my son. You could be out in the field for months at a time. I get to rest my head on a pillow at night. I bet you don’t have the luxury in the places you travel. You probably see more carnage on one mission than I do in an entire year.”
“It’s not about whose trauma is worse. It’s still there. It still eats away at your soul from the inside out. And trust me, some of the accidents and shootings stateside look just as bad here as they do across seas.”
“And while you’re carrying around all my burdens, who’s going to help with yours?”
There was a beat of silence. “You. Remember? Bravest together. I might not be able to tell you the specifics of a mission, but I do know when I’m in pain, when I’ve reached my threshold for humanity, you’ll be the one I go to. The one who will ground me. You’re my equal. My partner. Someone strong enough to handle anything life hands us.”
She was so touched by his words, her own were locked up tight in her throat. He didn’t let it be awkward, though. He must’ve sensed that she was sorting things out in her head.
“My house is close. Really close. I know you probably have some last-minute things to pack, but can I bring you there first?”
She nodded, not really sure what he was asking, but she was so bone-tired she didn’t care where they went as long as she could sleep. “’Kay. Long as we beat the bus to my house.”
Hunter helped her into the passenger seat and grabbed a sweatshirt from the back, tucking it around her like a blanket. Her head lolled, but she jerked awake. He deserved an explanation after an hour of supporting her through the breakdown. As if sensing her thought, he said, “Sleep. I’ll take you home.” Home. Was he referring to his or hers? Either way, a little thrill rushed through her chest. Hunter and Collin both under one roof? Listening to them in the kitchen making one of their creations or tossing a ball together outside was enough to make her melt, but before she could do that, sleep—hard and deep—stole her.
*
Hannah stretched, and buried her nose further into the downy pillow, drawing Hunter’s fresh, zesty scent into her lungs. It felt like she was lying on a big cloud, definitely not her own small bed at home. The light was bright inside the room. She gasped and sat up quickly. Collin. What time was it? How long had she slept? There was no one in the bed beside her even though she could’ve sworn strong arms had been wrapped around her waist. She barely recalled showering and Hunter helping her into some of his clothes.
She reached up to find the tips of her hair still damp. She tossed back the comforter, swung her feet to the floor, and stood. The light oak planks were cool beneath her bare feet. She took in her surroundings. The room was beautiful with cathedral ceilings and natural light spilling from a large window. The space was gorgeous, but the one feature she couldn’t take her eyes off was the framed picture hanging on Hunter’s wall. The only one in the entire room. The card Collin had made Hunter. The one she’d delivered to the hospital. Her heart beat faster. If Hunter hadn’t come after her, if he hadn’t insisted on wedging himself into their lives, she could’ve lost this before she even had it. Before she realized how rare and precious their connection was.
Fear had held her back in the beginning, but she couldn’t deny what she felt for him any longer. It had shimmered beneath her skin for some time now, but she was finally ready to recognize it for what it was. Hunter was meant to be hers. Hers and Collin’s. He was the person who completed their family.
She glanced at the clock. It was noon. They had three and a half hours before they had to meet the bus at her house. Alone time was rare, and although she wasn’t ready to share the words with Hunter, she wanted more. Him. She wandered into the hall and the buttery scent of…something delicious made her stomach growl. She found the stairs and took them to the first floor. The entire layout was light and airy with an open living room, kitchen, and dining area.
“Morning.” Hunter flashed her a smile. One of the full-blown ones that made dimples pop on his cheeks. Her stomach went weightless, like she was free-falling. Or maybe that was exactly what she was doing.
“Hi.” She crossed to the large center island where Hunter stood with spatula and a griddle, flipping grilled cheese. Nothing sounded more delicious at the moment, except for maybe Hunter himself. She walked right into him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He stilled. She heard the clank of the spatula against the granite, then his arms came around her. Encompassing her.
“You were right,” she murmured, cheek pressed up against the softness of his shirt. “I need a way to manage the grief my job brings. Even though I’ll never agree that we’re on the same playing field, there are things I can’t unsee that I need to deal with. Thanks for having my back this morning.” She released her hold, dropping her arms to her sides.
“I’ll always have your back, Hannah. Every time.” He caressed the length of her hair. The affectionate gestures made her feel cared for. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not yet. I need to put it to the side for just a little while. Focus on all the good in my life. Including you.” She emphasized those last words, hoping he’d find truth in them.
“The first thing you’re going to focus on is eating. Go sit on the couch. It’s more comfortable than the island or the dining room.”
She took a breath and offered him a smile. “I think I like this bossy side of you.”