Page 159 of At Her Pleasure
The man’s bracelet was made of antique gold links, separated by four black disks. Each disk was flanked by square cut crystals, in seven different colors. A flat, rectangular lock hooked onto one side of the bracelet, waiting to be fastened to the opposite end.
“Our initials are engraved on the disks,” Ros said. “And each of us chose a word to put on the back.”
“Faith,” said Vera.
Skye made a sign with her hands. “Courage,” Cyn supplied.
“Loyalty,” said Ros, meeting his eyes.
“Trust,” Abby finished.
“The crystals are the colors of the chakras,” Vera said. “They help with balance and healing. Peace of mind.”
“The lock is Cyn’s, of course,” Ros smiled. “It also has a word on the back of it. Mistress. A reminder. You are hers exclusively,” she gestured to Cyn, “but your wellbeing is owned by all of us. Do you understand?”
Slowly, Mick nodded. Cyn took the bracelet out and turned it over, reading the words. His gaze dropped to look at it, then he reached out and touched it, their fingers brushing. “I’m honored,” he said. “And a little terrified.”
“There’s a key to the lock in there,” Ros said to Cyn. “But we had five made.” Her gaze shifted to Mick. “We all have one. Another part of the message, reinforcing it.”
She picked up an envelope Abby had put beneath the box. “Our family has expanded these past few years,” she noted, glancing at Skye and Abby. “Cyn respects your privacy, Mick, but we haven’t been oblivious to the difficulty of these past few weeks, the drastic changes in your life. We recognized a way for us to help.”
He shifted uncomfortably, but when Cyn reached out and clasped his hand, it helped him settle.
It’s okay, she thought. They’re family. You’ll learn, just like I did, that it’s not something to be antsy about.
Ros opened the envelope and unfolded the handwritten paper. “This is a letter to you, from Lawrence. He wrote it with Tiger and Neil’s input.” Her gaze softened as she skimmed her man’s words. It told Cyn that it was the first time her boss was seeing them herself.
Ros cleared her throat. “I’m going to read it aloud, because, like the bracelet, it’s a gift that should be witnessed.”
Mick kept his hand in Cyn’s, their grip tight.
Mick,
Love for a Mistress is something that can’t be defined. They demand we give them everything, but we want to protect and cherish them, so how do we reconcile that when we have bad shit to work out inside ourselves? When the load is way more than what we want to put upon them?
Though they’re strong and willing enough to take it all, and we know sharing it with them is important, a man, and a submissive, has a mandate of his own. Healing, living with yourself, loving her, all of it requires a place to stand on your own feet and fight it out with those demons.
You have those places with us. Neil will take you out into the bayou where he’s found peace, after being in places no one would ever want to know about.
I’ll take you on workouts with me and Max, another former SEAL, and we’ll sweat you down to the bone. It helps, I promise.
Tiger has spare bikes and knows all the backroads, where you can open up and roar. It’s where he came to grips with the violence that dictated the first part of his life and almost kept him from ever finding his Mistress.
Cyn noted Skye’s soft smile, the tightening of her fingers against the elbows she had resting on the table. Abby had her head dipped, listening, her lovely hazel eyes thoughtful. Vera’s expression was impossible to read, until she looked toward Cyn and gave her a look of deep love and understanding. Unconditional support.
In those places, you can fight it out, find your peace. And always come back to her arms.
You’re not alone, man. Never again.
Ros read the last few lines with some emotion in her voice, then folded up the paper. “I will leave this here. It’s yours.”
Mick couldn’t seem to speak for several moments. “Thank you,” he said at last. He made an oddly formal gesture, a slight bow to the whole table, before he met Cyn’s gaze. Emotional overload was threatening, but neither of them ever flinched from pain, did they?
Mick, masochist that he was, decided to exacerbate it.
“Loving someone isn’t easy, but you never really stop loving someone.” His voice was thick. “Even when you fall out of love with someone, you love them for the memories you made. I came from a broken home, like a lot of people.” His gaze swept the table and came back to Cyn. “What I learned from watching my parents before I lost them was this. Even worse than the falling out of love was the constant disappointment they dished out to one another. Disappointment is what builds up over time and sucks the heart and soul from you, even if you stay together.”
He took a breath. “I’m pretty fucked up right now. I know that. I promise all of you I’ll do my very best to serve her the way a Mistress like her should be served. With my last breath, with the last drop of blood. With my last smile or laugh, with the last good feeling I have on this earth. It will all be about and because of her.”