Page 41 of Toxic Wishes

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Page 41 of Toxic Wishes

“This is my life, Mel, and I’m not sad. I’m just….venting..”

“I know what will cheer you up,” Mel says.

“What?”

“Guess who looked all sad walking into Skybar the other night?”

“Who?”

“Jared.” She says it with affliction, and I would be lying if I said it didn’t sting.

I scoffed. “Uh, why in the hell would that make me feel better?”

“Girl, you know I ignored his ass when he started questioning me and asking where you went, what’s your address, and all that shit. Oh, and then, seven days ago, I saw him on the set of an audition for a model or fill-in, some pathetic role for one of my dad’s films he’s producing. Gosh, he’s so lame. I’m so glad you broke it off with him.”

“Ya, he texted me some shitty stuff last night.” I played it off, but his words stuck in the pit of my stomach like mold, eating away at my esteem.

“Oh, I’m sure it was because he was piss-ass drunk, and he’s still mad that you beat him to the punch. Maybe this will humble his ass. I mean, Jared is good-looking, but that cocky-ass attitude is such a turn-off, even for a good-looking guy in LA. He is a dime a dozen. At least stand out somehow.”

A light chuckle leaves me. “Ya, I know.”

“And stop it.” She snaps.

“Stop what?” I scrunch my face in confusion, glad she can’t see my expression.

“Stop telling yourself he’s the best you ever had, or you won’t find better looking. Because I know that’s what you think, and that’s a bunch of horse shit. You know you’re a fucking badass. You hold the power of your confidence and no one else.”

Mel was right. Me being here, on top of the breakup and then the message I received from Jared the other night confirming he cheated. Had my emotions all over the place. Even though I left him, it still hurt. Just made all those nasty texts he sent seem even more accurate. And our whole relationship was a waste of time. Regret is all I feel right now,

“You’re right. Like I said, I think once I get a job and stay busy, it will help occupy my time.”

Because crying daily is not a hobby, I look in the mirror and see my puffy eyes. I was getting better, though. Today was the first day I hadn’t cried since thinking about my life or Jared.

“Oh shit, I have to go. My mom wants us to bond more, so she got us pedicures, on top of getting our hair done, then a massage to end it with.”

“Nice. Living that boogie lifestyle.”

“Ya, I can’t complain.” She says.

“Have fun,” I say with a chuckle

“Love you, call me later, babe.”

“Love you too.” and we both hang up.

A couple of hours later, I caved into Josh’s offer. I didn’t see Josh’s car at the lakehouse. There was a car here, but I had no idea who it belonged to. And it was parked by the side of the road, so it could be anyone’s since the houses are next to each other. I take in the tall trees and greenery. California was beautiful but in a beach way, with lots of hills. Missouri wasn’t flat by any means, but the trees gave it a whole other feel, along with the mystical forests, foggy mornings, and beautiful sunsets. It felt more natural. The air smelled fresh and clean, as if pollution didn’t exist with the millions of people like California.

The scent invites me in, as the musty-rich aroma hits my nose. I punch in the code to the garage, and it opens. I see a car parked inside, but Josh told me to go through the house to get to the part of the rental lake house that is not attached, and the only way to do that was through the garage since I didn’t have a key.

Walking through the two-story house, I don’t see or hear anyone. Relief runs through me, and my shoulders slump over as I relax. I get to the back door and see the part of the house that was added that Josh said was safe to stay in, at least for tonight. Maybe I can apply for more jobs while I'm here.

As soon as I get to the door, I curse under my breath because it looks like I would need a key to get in, but when I reach to open the door knob, it turns.

“Thank God,” I say to myself. I step inside, and my body freezes as soon as I do. I'm met with a pair of blue eyes. At first, I think I’m just hallucinating, since I haven’t eaten all day. My mom bitched at me when I tried to make a sandwich after my dad left, taking her anger out on me since she wasn’t done bitching him out before he decided to leave. So I threw the bread down on the plate along with the lettuce when she said, “God, can’t I eat in peace,” like I was bothering her by just being there. So I left without saying a word. Of course, she didn’t call me to apologize or say sorry and tell me to return. She never does. She just let me leave like I was nothing.

Colt continues to thrust into the skinny blonde with fake boobs, and it registers that the woman he’s fucking is not my cousin. She starts to moan and grab her tits, completely unaware I’m in the room with them.

“Colt, yes, don’t stop. Right there.”




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