Page 88 of Toxic Wishes
“So I was your guinea pig?” Annoyance festers inside me.
She shrugs her shoulders. “Precisely”
“I have learned you can hide any bad taste with a banana and an apple mixed with honey. You should make it for Bodie sometime. It’s a great way for kids to get their nutrients. I put spinach in it, too. That’s why it’s green.”
I sigh, setting the drink down. “Look, I know you're punishing me for last night, b-”
“Colt, it’s fine.”
“Well, I think we should at least talk about it.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. We kissed, not a big deal.”
“I didn’t mean to.”
“I know, I get it.” she cuts me off, and I’m somewhat grateful.“You were under the influence. Drunk. Not in your right state of mind. I could have been anyone.”
“What?”
“Like I said, it’s not a big deal.”
“Wait a minute.” I grab her wrist as she starts to walk off, and she looks at my hand, then at me. I trail my eyes to her tattoo.
Blake
I released her hand. “That’s not why I’m apologizing.”
“It’s not? Then why are you?” She furrowed her brows at me.
“Because-” I search for my words
“Blake? Is that why?” She finally says.
Yes. Partially, anyway, but I wasn’t going to admit that to her.
“Look, I don’t go around fucking any girl, if that’s what you think. Just because I’m a jock doesn’t mean I fuck everything. It’s nice to have a conversation with someone once in a while before I’m already getting my dicked sucked, or a girl is throwing herself at me.”
Her eyes go wide.
“It’s like your parents giving you money and taking you to a candy store, telling you, go ahead. Have whatever you want. And when you get inside, you realize you don’t want anything because you know you can have it all.”
She laughs lightly. “So that’s it. You want me because you can’t have me? Because of Blake?”
Would she stop saying his name?
“No,” I set the cup down forcefully. “I’m saying I get tired of women wanting me for one thing. They see me, and they see a meal ticket. A way out. Did you know Namoi didn’t even know I had two brothers? She didn’t even know Josh was my half-brother until she found out you were living here.”
I can see realization settle on her, and her expression goes soft.
“No, I didn’t know that.”
“And ya, I don’t know how to separate you and Blake because every time I look at you, I see my dead brother. I see his crush. His first love.”
She cocks her head to the sice and shakes it. “I told you we were just friends.”
“Ya, well, I’m having a hard time believing that,” I say in a low tone.
“You don’t have to worry about separating anything. I’m leaving, remember. I got my cable hooked up to my battery and ready to go, so whenever you are ready, I would appreciate it if you could drive your truck up to the hood of my car so you can give me a jump start.”