Page 86 of Class Studies
The professor wrapped me in his long arms and pulled me into his chest.
My final tear dripped into his shirt before I pushed out of his arms and looked up again. Beryl waited. I needed to fix this.
I slowly climbed. My metal stairs rattling with each step. Halfway up, I remembered the view Tanwyn was getting of my undercarriage. I turned pink and glanced down, but he’d moved to Professor Garnet’s side. The two leaned against my little kitchen counter with their heads together.
As I stepped into my loft, the same strange silence Nurse Norah put around me descended. Beryl lay in the center of my bed, shirtless, with his arm behind his head, supporting his head. I perched on the edge of my mattress, facing away from him.
“You lied to me,” Beryl said quietly, his voice raw. “You kept secrets from me.”
I took a deep breath. “I thought I needed this, and I didn’t want to get you in trouble.”
He growled. “I said leave the shit behind.”
I spun to him, but he only stared at my ceiling. “You’re not shit, Beryl!”
“I killed the girls in my harem.” Beryl’s eyes glazed over. “One after another, they got caught up in my deals, and the administration took them out. Each time, I let it happen. Hell, I threw Libby under the bus after she went behind my back and worked with Nitis.”
I sucked in a breath.
The skin around Beryl’s eyes tightened. “It’s a goddamned cycle.”
Crossing my ankles under me, I leaned toward him. “It’s not a cycle.” I poked my bent knee. “It’s not the same thing. I won’t abandon you, and I’m not working with anyone. I needed three things to save you and Ashe. You pulled away from me.” I poked myself harder. “I couldn’t ask you because you would’ve said no.”
Beryl barked out a laugh. “To save us from what?”
I hugged myself. “From me, Beryl. I’ve somehow bound you. All of you! Maybe it’s the nature of transfers, but I can’t keep doing this.” My voice hitched. “You almost died today.” Tears streamed down my cheeks, and I shook. “I’m not working with Nitis. I just want to love you without doing what my master did to me.”
Beryl’s eyes widened, and he sat up, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me forward. I buried my face in his chest. His smell, his power, everything that was Beryl became my world.
I couldn’t let myself enjoy it. I tried to wiggle free, but he held me tight.
“You’re not Damon,” Beryl said harshly. “You’re not manipulating anyone. You’re not controlling anyone. I’m in love with you. So are Ashe and the professor. It’s Love, Dot.”
“Love is just another way of binding people to you.” I tried to push away from him. “I’ve watched it. All of you are changing your lives for me.”
Beryl held me tighter. “We’re growing as a group. It’s what bros do. If you would stop running from your fears, you’d realize it too.”
I barked out a bitter laugh. “That’s rich. After you told me Libby and I were the same. Pot calling the kettle black. What have you done for the last hour? Lie here and come up with excuses to ditch me before I can ditch you?”
Beryl’s grip on me loosened, and I slipped out of his arms. Before I could scramble off the bed, he grabbed my arm.
“You’re right,” he said softly. “That’s what I did.” He released me. “But it’s not what I wanted to do.”
I froze mid escape.
Beryl lay back down. His muscled build sank into my brown comforter and trembled. My heart broke. I sat with one foot on the cold stone of my floor and the other still on the bed.
Everyone abandoned Beryl, but I wouldn’t. I couldn’t. He was my rock.
I crawled back onto the bed, staying a finger’s breadth from his warm skin. His sapphire rims glowed with unshed tears in the low light of my loft.
“I won’t leave you,” I whispered. “We’re not leaving you.”
Beryl didn’t look at me. “If you believe you’re forcing us, you’ll leave all of us.”
My heart throbbed painfully, and my gut twisted. “It’s so hard to believe anything else.”
Beryl shifted and wrapped his arm around me, bringing me to his bare chest. I relaxed against him and ran my hand across his stomach before resting it between his pecs.